


A Light in the Dark

by Leradomi



Category: Batman (Comics), Batman - All Media Types
Genre: Brotherly Fluff, Family Bonding, Finding Oneself, Hurt/Comfort, Illnesses, Implied Non-Con, Jason can still be an asshole, Mental breakdowns all around, The major character death has already happened, but so can Dick
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-25
Updated: 2019-02-18
Packaged: 2019-07-17 07:13:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 16
Words: 39,868
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16090661
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Leradomi/pseuds/Leradomi
Summary: After Batman's death, the Wayne clan attempts to rally together and help each other - especially Tim, who's already lost so much.  in a moment of desperation, Dick calls Jason back home, hoping he can help heal Tim, but also hoping Jason will heal as well.   (Story is already written it's just a matter of posting)





	1. Chapter 1/Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> This takes place after Bruce/Batman has died and Battle for the Cowl hasn’t happen (nor will happen really). Some things are AU in the timeline but most everything is together.  
> THANK YOU to my beta AlexSkywalker!

A Light in the Dark

Prologue/Chapter 1

It was a typical night in Gotham: dark, cold and dank. Jason Todd stood atop a rooftop looking out over the city as he turned his jacket collar up to the cold. He was without his signature red helmet tonight, wearing only a domino mask. Hoodlums feared the Red Hood with or without the red helmet; However, with the cold air nipping at his face, Jason was regretting his decision to forgo it.   
Looking out over the skyline he saw his reason for running tonight. He was keeping his distance from his pursuer, the one little assassin Damian Wayne. Jason was amazed that the little one was out on his own and couldn’t help thinking they really needed to get that kid a costume instead the grey leotard he was currently wearing. Jason had been back in the country all of 4 hours before the bird started looking for him again. Before he had left the country on some “business” all of the birds had been looking for him. Jason pondered what he had done this time to regain their attention.   
Speaking of the birds, Jason hadn’t seen the Bat in a while. Why were the birds suddenly out on their own? Where was the Bat? As he was mulling this over he heard the soft landing of small feet. Shit, Damian had doubled back and found him. Jason cursed himself for getting lost in his thoughts and not keeping an eye out for the little one as he turned around to face Damian.  
“So….ya found me. Well done. Now what do you want?” Jason growled getting straight to the point.  
“You need to see Grayson at the cave.” Damian stated matching Jason’s lack of pleasantries.  
“And why would I do that? Is that why you guys have been looking for me? Nightwing, Robin and the shortest assassin in the world.”  
“You have been difficult to find as of late.”  
“I’ve been busy Demon Spawn.”  
“You were completely off the radar for an entire week.”  
“I was out of the country if you must know short shit from hell. Now what. Do. You. Want.”  
“I believe I made that clear, you need to see Grayson at the cave. The security codes have been changed to Alpha 3 protocol. That should be easy enough for you to get in without trouble.”  
“Look little devil why didn’t the big bad Bat come and ask me himself? Where has he been lately? I am going no where near that cave with Daddy Bats there you should know that, you genetic mutant.” Jason noticed that Damian wasn’t rising to the bait or responding to the taunts that usually riled the child up.  
Damian tilted his head looking at Jason puzzled. “Tt. You don’t know do you?”  
“Know what?” Jason asked suspiciously. Something was wrong. Did something happen to Bruce? Did something happen to the Replacement? Jason’s thoughts were scrambling in his head to make some sense over whether he cared or not, but either way, he still had a front to keep up. Damian’s glare caused Jason to turn away at look back out at the city.  
Finally Damian spoke again; “We thought that you were just being…well…you.”  
“What’s that supposed to mean.”  
“The ass that we all know you can be. But you don’t know. That’s tragic. You really should go see Grayson at the cave now. Dick needs you. He was doing so well at first…but now…he’s just falling apart.”  
“Over what?” Jason asked. He whipped around and found himself met with an empty rooftop. ‘He’s gotten good at that.’ Jason thought.  
Jason tried to pick apart which person was really in trouble or needed help; his estranged adoptive father, his golden boy older brother, or the Replacement that Jason had grown to have some respect for. The way Damian spoke…… he hadn’t been there to fight, hadn’t been there to argue. He was being genuine in his request for Jason to come to the cave. Curiosity piqued and with nothing else to do for the night, The Red Hood headed for the one place he swore to never return to: the Batcave.


	2. Chapter 2

A Light in the Dark  
Again a big thank you to my beta Alex Skywalker!!   
Following and putting the story as a favorite are nice and I appreciate it but I would love some reviews. Why did you follow or favorite the story? What about it did you like? Was there anything I can improve on?  
Chapter 2

Jason parked his bike far away from the Wayne Manor Bat-cave entrance and chose to hike on foot the rest of the way to the cave. The time walking gives him time to clear his head from all the possibilities of what in the hell is going on. When he finally reached the cave entrance he entered the security codes for the protocol that Damian had given him. The old door, made to look like part of the mountain, slowly slid open, complete with the groans and creaks straight from some cheap horror movie. Jason made no attempt to hide his entrance knowing full well that he was expected. As Jason rounded the last curve of the entryway he was greeted by the sight of none other than Dick Grayson, currently Nightwing, since he was in costume, sitting at the giant computer. His body was all lax in the giant computer chair and he was leaning to the left, with half of his head propped up in his left hand which rested on the arm of the computer chair. Though Nightwing’s back was to Jason, he could see Nightwing’s mask resting on the computer desk. Jason could tell the older man was awake by the subtle movements he was making in the chair and, with his training, could obviously hear Jason approaching, so why wasn’t he acknowledging Jason’s presence? Jason approached Nightwing’s left side and saw that Dick was indeed awake.  
“Dick?” Jason questioned. He was shocked to see Nightwing suddenly sit straight up in the chair. Jason had surprised him, not an easy thing to do by any means. This only made Jason’s head fill with more dreadful thoughts if Nightwing himself could be taken by surprise- in the bat-cave of all places.  
“Jason.” Dick said. “Damian found you. I’m so glad you came.” Dick slowly stood up and walked to Jason. The shadows were playing with Dick’s face as he kept it down like he was hiding something. Were those tear tracks on Dick’s face?  
“Wanna tell me why I’m here? Demon spawn didn’t say much.”  
“Umm….well….I’m..umm…..not quite sure…how to…” Dick stumbled as he kept his head down and played with the blue fingerstripes on his suit. Dick bit his bottom lip, an obvious sign that he was trying to keep himself from crying. Enough was enough. Jason couldn’t stand not knowing what was tearing apart one of the strongest men he knew. Jason purposefully walked up to Dick and grabbed the man’s shoulders strongly, causing Dick to look at him in shock. There Jason could see it: the dark circles under Dick’s eyes. The red face highlighted by several tears that had previously fallen. The sunken in cheeks that said he hadn’t been eating properly. The shock in the eyes that knew if he had to say it one more time he would fall apart. But Jason couldn’t spare him; he had to know what had happened.  
“Dick, what’s going on?”  
“Bruce is dead.” Dick said it suddenly and quickly as if that would help, but it didn’t.   
Jason let go of Dick’s shoulders in shock and Dick’s eyes filled up with tears once more. Jason turned away. He wasn’t ready for Dick to see the shock and pain on his own face. Jason had run by the possibility of Bruce’s death several times on the way here but always tossed it away. It had always seemed that Batman…that Bruce was immortal. But, Jason knew that what Dick said had to be true. The state of Dick’s emotions left no room for lies or jokes. Bruce was dead. There would be no more attempts at reconciliation. No more attempts at closure. No more….what was it they had anyways?  
“You’re sure? Jason asked still turned away from Dick. He had to ask, even though he knew the answer. The how and why of what happened could wait until both men were in better control of their emotions.  
“Yes. Superman brought in the body. We buried him. Bruce…however …well…we had to maintain the charade for security reasons. We tried to find you Jason, to tell you. We tried to find you in time for the private funeral.” Dick kept his eyes locked on Jason waiting for some sign on how Jason was going to take this. Jason gave him nothing but his back and a raised hand halting Dick’s speech. The tears came too fast for Dick to suppress them any longer and a sob broke through.  
At the sound of the sob Jason turned to Dick. Jason was unsure of how to talk to Dick about this. Jason’s relationship with Bruce was so different than Dick’s. Jason never wanted Bruce dead; that was a fact. True, he fought Bruce, but never once did he go for a killing blow. Even with the big confrontation between him, Bruce and Joker, Jason had made it so Bruce would have to kill him and not the other way around. Jason’s relationship with Dick, though, was different. Through his ups and downs with the family Jason had fought Tim, even fought Damian, but no matter how many times Jason tried to rattle Dick or tried to get him to fight, Dick would never do it. It was like if he went to Jason’s level then he had given up on him. That was something that was always clear to Jason, that Dick would never give up on him. So now Jason knew he had to do the same for Dick and not give up on him….he had to be there for Dick no matter how hard it was for him.   
Since Jason’s resurrection there had been good times and bad times between him and his family. And though this was quite obviously a bad time that the family was going through, Jason felt that he could turn it into a good time – or at least an okay time. Maybe he could finally have an ‘okay’ time with hios family. But, something still stirred beneath that. Jealousy, anger- years’ worth of both that weren’t so easily squashed in a second. However, Jason made every attempt to push those feelings down as he couldn’t stand to see Dick cry.  
Jason slowly walked to the now sobbing man and rested a hand on his shoulder and squeezed. Though he was determined to help Dick he was still very unsure as to how to go about it.  
“How is everyone else taking it?” He asked.  
“Well…Damian…..he’s a bit wise beyond his years and isn’t the greatest with emotions-“  
“He’s his father’s son.” Jason said and Dick nodded and chuckled through a sob at that.  
“He puts everything concerning all this logically. He said that, given Bruce’s lifestyle, that this was bound to be the way that he would go and he had an honorable death fighting for what he believed in. Alfred is Alfred; he hasn’t stopped working, but you can tell he’s hurting. He is just dealing with it by keeping Bruce’s legacy alive- making sure his boys are all ok. And me….. I’m okay.” When Dick said that last part Jason glared at him. This was okay for Dick? Jason would have to get a mirror and hold it up to Dick sometime. But, before Jason could comment, Dick continued.  
“It’s Tim I’m worried about. He’s a bit more closed off. Not really talking or saying anything. He thinks I’m not aware of what he is doing but I am.”  
“And what is he doing?” Jason asked. Was that concern for the replacement Jason felt rising up? The jealousy and hurt feelings of being replaced came right alongside the concern for Tim and Jason had trouble pushing back the right feeling.  
“He acts like he is sleeping fine, but he’s not. I can hear his nightmares, yet when I go to him he insists he’s fine. Stubbing his toe on the bed frame is his most popular excuse. He acts like he’s eating fine but I can see him losing weight that he just can’t afford to lose. He’s already skinny as it is. Damian said he heard him throwing up after dinner once. Tim denied it, which led to World War 3 in the house. Luckily most of the major criminal players in Gotham are currently locked up which gives us some time to figure out patrol and how Batman will live on in Gotham, being as that only we and the League know about his death. But how are you? Ya know…with this?”  
“It’s a shock. After Damian’s visit I knew something was up. I considered that this was a possibility but…I don’t know. I don’t think it’s really sunk in yet.”  
Dick nodded “I was that way at first too.”  
“How are you doing?”  
“I told you I’m fine.”  
“Yah right.”  
“Jason, I’m good.”  
“Bullshit. You’re crying, you look like you could crumble any second. Do you realize how easy it was for me to sneak up on you, in the bat-cave of all places? Are you okay because you have to be? Because there’s no other option? I have a feeling that the reason you called me here wasn’t just to tell me ‘Bruce is dead, go have a nice day’.”  
“Ok…I need help.”  
“No shit.”  
“I mean….well….I don’t need help….not with me, I mean…I need help with Tim, with things, with Gotham. Tim has lost so much. His parents, three of his best friends, Stephanie, Bart and Conner. Losing Bruce was just the straw that broke the camel’s back. Tim needs more help than just what I can give him. He needs the whole family. He needs to have a family.”  
Jason nodded his head in agreement, though also knowing Dick needed help too. “I had heard about his friends. I had heard that he and Conner were…in a relationship?”  
“I had heard that too, though Tim would never tell me yes or no about it.”  
“So you need me, of all people, to help the replacement?”  
“I need you to help complete the family. I need you here.”  
Jason drew in a shuddering breath. Losing Bruce and now having the opportunity to be back in the family….. He was actually considering Dick’s offer and Bruce wasn’t even here to see it…or be a part of it. Jason drew in another shuddering breath as the sting of hot tears met his eyes. He turned his head to the side, clenched his fists, and grimaced, keeping his lips tight together in fear that, should they open, a sob would break forth. He would not lose it. He would not cry in front of Dick.   
“Jason…it’s ok.” Dick was aware of what Jason was doing. “It’s a lot to take in. I understand if you can’t do it right now.”  
“I’ll stay on one condition.”  
“Name it.” Dick said, shocked Jason was considering staying.  
“Admit you aren’t dealing well with this either. Admit you are part of what needs help too.”  
“I’m….fine.” Dick said and another silent traitorous tear rolled down his face, branding him as a liar.  
Jason walked back to Dick and pulled him into an embrace and just….held him. Dick felt a drop of wetness on the side of his face that Jason was pressed to. Dick had done it. He had gotten Jason back. If only Bruce was here to enjoy it. That thought put Dick back over the edge and he started sobbing again. As his sobs became vocal Jason just held on tighter. Jason wasn’t going to let go until he knew he could help Dick get through tonight. Jason tried to convince himself he could do this, even if it was one small step at a time.   
First step: Get Dick to admit he needed help too.


	3. Chapter 3

A Light in the Dark  
Another big thank you to my beta Alex Skywalker!!!

Chapter 3

As Jason held Dick to him he tried to figure out just how to help Dick first. He knew that if he could help Dick then maybe sticking around to help the others wouldn’t be so bad.  
“So am I staying or going?” Jason asked, though he already had it clearly in his head that he would stay and help Dick, whether he admitted it or not.  
“What?” Dick asked lost in the new found brotherhood Jason was being so accepting of.  
“How. Are. You? I know you. “ Jason let go yet still held on to Dick’s shoulder to get a good look at his face as he continued. “You are probably trying to keep both Gotham and Bludhaven under control. Keep your job at the Bludhaven P.D., keep the Bruce-is-still-alive charade up, which involves meetings at Wayne Enterprises, and of course keeping the house and its occupants in order. Any one of those things could be too much for one person. And you, Golden Boy, probably thought you could do it all at once. News flash: you can’t. Even short shit notices you can’t.”  
“It …….has been difficult.”  
“That’s all I needed to hear, Dick.” Jason saw Dick faintly smile. “Besides if I have to go through and show mushy shit over this then so do you.”   
“I don’t know what to do next.” Dick said, ignoring Jason’s last comment, as he walked back to the computer chair and flopped into it. Jason followed close behind. “Hell I don’t know what to do now. I don’t know what to do after next I …..I just…..don’t know.” Dick put his face in his hands and openly sobbed. Jason watched Dick fall apart again, inwardly begging for some way to handle this.  
“When was the last time you ate?” He finally asked.  
“Huh?”  
“And slept.”  
“That’s not what I mean; I’m talking about Gotham and Wayne Enterprises and-“  
“I know what you meant but how can you do any of this if you aren’t eating and sleeping? Because you clearly aren’t. Throw me a bone here; how do you expect me to help Tim if I can’t even help you admit you aren’t taking care of yourself.”  
Dick knew he was beat. “It’s like I can’t even remember to do it. I have so much…..responsibility…I can’t even remember to eat, to sleep, to do anything. Maybe that’s also why I called you here.” Dick was still sobbing.  
“Well I’m not even going to be showing my face at Wayne Enterprises; that would be a lot of explaining, wouldn’t it?” Jason half chuckled. “But, I can help with patrol and some of the house stuff, alright? That’s all I can promise right now.”  
“Ok. But…don’t fight with them. Just ignore Damian; he is throwing out his taunts as a way of just keeping some normalcy I think.”  
“Ok, no promises, but I think we are done in here,” Jason said pressing the button to turn off the massive computer. He easily prevented Dick from stopping him.  
“But I still have-“  
“To eat and sleep and deal with things.”  
Dick took a deep breath as a way to try to keep the hyperventilating at bay and put his head in his hands again. Jason couldn’t tell if he was rocking or swaying in the chair.  
“Come on up and at ‘em.” Jason said as he tapped Dick’s shoulder. Dick stood and took all of three steps before he swayed. He fell halfway into Jason before Jason caught him around the waist. Jason looked at Dick, shocked that he would run himself down this much. The hero was pale and squinting his eyes shut as if to block out the dizziness.  
“Whoa. Whoa ok. That’s wasn’t cool.” Jason swung one of Dick’s arms around his shoulders. “Do I have to carry you up these stairs or can we just walk together?”  
“Walk.” Dick sniffled, still not in control of his emotions.  
“Good. I was hoping for that option. I’m getting you into bed and getting Alfred to make you something to eat - which you will eat even if I have to feed you and please don’t make me feed you.”  
Dick smiled and even chuckled, finally. It was short lived, however. As they slowly went up the long, narrow stairs up to the house Dick went back to sobbing. “Dick, calm down. It’s going to be ok. We’ll figure it out. Just….shit…ask for help once in a while.”  
Dick raised an eyebrow at Jason and said nothing.  
“What? Don’t look at me like that. I can ask for help too.”  
The raised eyebrow remained.  
“Sometimes. I…well….can we just get up the stairs.” Jason heard Dick’s breathing increase. Jason didn’t want Dick going into a full blown panic attack. “Breathe Dick.” Jason reminded him. Dick couldn’t remember to eat and sleep and now he can’t even remember to take a deep breath.   
Dick’s arm remained over Jason’s shoulders and Jason’s other arm rubbed small circles on Dick’s back as a way to try and calm him down. Jason remembered it was actually something Dick would do to calm him down when he was younger, much younger, before he….the memory brought tears to his eyes and too many bad memories that accompanied it. Dick…Focus on Dick. Jason starting asking frivolous questions to Dick; what he wanted Alfred to make, if he should expect Damian to try and sneak out to patrol, and anything else Jason could think of until they reached Dick’s room.  
When they got to Dick’s room Jason allowed Dick to flop onto the bed. The older man fell to the side, his head hitting the pillow, and Jason thought he might have fallen asleep right there. Tears still ran down Dick’s face, with mixing with other fluids running out of his nose. Jason rummaged through Dick’s drawers without hearing complaint from Dick and found a sleep shirt and sweatpants. He put them on the bed next to Dick and knelt down to face to face with his brother to make sure he was awake and could hear him.   
“Dick, I put some clothes on the bed for you to change into. Do you think you can handle that while I get Alfred to make you something to eat?” Jason asked. He was met with slightly opened eyes and a small nod. Jason reached for a tissue on the nightstand and wiped Dick’s face.   
Jason didn’t see Dick make a move to get dressed. “Come on, Dickie boy, get dressed for bed.” He pulled Dick up into a sitting position, pulling the cord out of the back of the Nightwing suit and unzipping the back of Dick’s uniform. Jason remembered wearing the Nightwing costume: unzipping the back to get out of the costume was a bitch and a doubted Dick could have handled it in his state. Jason walked to the door as Dick started to pull down the top portion of his uniform. As Jason exited the room he looked back one last time and saw Dick’s bare chest and arms. Multiple bruises and bandages littered both and his ribs were taped on the right side. He would probably have to check that later as Dick failed to mention it to him. Typical.   
‘Damn it Dick why do you have to be so difficult?’ Jason thought, knowing Dick has probably thought the same about him several times. The door hadn’t yet shut when Dick called out to Jason.  
“You aren’t leaving tonight, right?” Dick said keeping his head down.  
“Huh?”  
“I mean, you’re staying here tonight, right? I just…I don’t want you to leave after what you’ve heard. I just …want you here…ya know.” Dick raised his head meeting Jason’s eyes. Jason could see the pleading in the eyes alone; Dick wouldn’t have had to say anything. He truly was desperate.  
“Don’t worry, Golden Boy, I said I was staying and I will. Get dressed and then get some shut eye while Al makes you something to eat.”  
Jason exited the room and headed downstairs to find Alfred tinkering away in the kitchen.  
“My word! Master Jason!” Alfred exclaimed, pulling Jason into a hug. “It is good to see you here. Have you spoken with Master Dick?”   
Jason returned the hug, breathing in the familiar scent that was Alfred. Pine scent, Aftershave, and a small hint of cleaner that was just so Alfred hit Jason’s nostrils and finally Jason felt like he was home.  
“Hi Al. I talked to Dick. He’s upstairs getting ready for bed and I was just wondering if there was anything I could get him to eat?” Jason asked smiling. Jason thought if he could just keep smiling then he could keep the tears at bay.  
“I shall make Master Dick’s favorite soup. Would you like a bowl for yourself Master Jason?” Jason nodded. “I am quite pleased you are here,” Alfred continued. “I am also quite please that Master Dick is finally agreeing to sleep and remembering to eat something. I imagine I have you to thank for that.”  
“It wasn’t easy Alfred. I know where he gets that damn stubbornness from.”  
Alfred put his head down at Jason’s statement, waiting for the water to boil. Memories of Bruce flooded through Alfred’s mind and Jason could see it all over his face. Jason felt bad for not realizing what he was saying. Jason walked over to Alfred and put an arm around his shoulders. “How are you Al? It’s good to see you. You hanging in there?” Anything to try and make up for his earlier mistake.  
“My heart is heavy, Master Jason, but it is good to see his legacy live on in the souls that still inhabit this house. In the young man I see standing before me.” Alfred said looking up and patted Jason’s cheeks. Good ole Alfred. The Butler had a way of looking at Jason and making Jason feel like he never did a wrong thing in his life.  
“This place would fall apart without you, Alfred. Be sure you count yourself as one of those souls in which this house inhabits.” Jason reminded making quotation marks in the air and smiling at Alfred who returned the gesture. “Speaking of other souls in the house, where are the others?”  
“Master Tim is upstairs in his room, asking to be left alone. I would honor that request as there was a….disturbance earlier,” Alfred said tilting his head and glaring at one small child sitting on the couch playing a hand held video game device. Damian. Of course. Jason turned to acknowledge the source of the….disturbance.  
“Damian.”  
“Todd.”   
That was the only response Jason got and probably all he was going to get. Jason sat himself on a kitchen stool and talked with Alfred until the soup was prepared. Jason declined Alfred’s offer to take the soup upstairs, saying that he still had to talk to Dick.  
Jason carefully balanced the tray, laden with two bowls and two glasses of soda, as he entered Dick’s room. Dick wasn’t in his bed but his whereabouts were soon answered as Dick walked out of the bathroom hair wet and freshly showered and wearing the clothes Jason had previously laid out for him. Jason set the tray down on the bed and beckoned him over. Dick had a large bed, large enough for them to both sit and eat on.  
“Shower felt good.”  
“I bet. Did you re-tape your ribs? Do you need Al or me to look at anything?” Jason asked.  
“I’m good.” Dick said and immediately noticed the same look Jason gave him from earlier when he said he was okay. “Jason, I’m fine. If my ribs or anything bothers me later I will immediately report to either you or Alfred. I swear.” Dick crawled under the covers and pulled the tray closer to him. Jason then kicked off his shoes and sat cross legged on top of the covers and started eating.  
They talked about everything and anything and about what was going to happen. They agreed to talk to the boys about Jason staying and what was going to happen tomorrow. Dick told Jason the details of Bruce’s death; how it happened and why. Details that didn’t at first seem important to Jason, but when he finally asked, Dick answered.  
As Dick recounted the events of Bruce’s death the tears came again and Jason handed Dick a tissue, as they were closer to Jason. Jason didn’t want Dick to start hyperventilating again when he was so close to getting him to get some sleep.   
“Dick, this is going to sound cliché and corny as shit but…….. one day at a time. One step at a time. If you start to take on too much at once you’ll just end up right where you were when I found you. We’ll figure one thing out at a time tomorrow and the rest will take care of itself. Don’t worry so much about it.”  
Dick nodded then suddenly looked alarmed. “Where’s Tim and Damian? They didn’t go out, did they?” Dick started to get out of bed but was halted by Jason’s hand on his arm.  
“Tim is in his room for the night requesting to be alone because Damian apparently started some shit with him. Alfred played referee. Damian was teaching Alfred how to play some video game when I came upstairs.”  
“Poor Alfred.” Dick sighed as he sat back in the bed. Jason nodded his agreement. “Since when did you become the voice of reason for this household?”   
“I don’t know. Maybe it’s the shock of the news. Maybe it’s seeing you like this. It probably won’t last though, so don’t count on it.”  
“Just….try, ok?”  
“Yah.”  
As they continued to talk Dick’s eyes soon fluttered shut and Jason caught the bowl before it was dropped and set the tray full of the dishes on the floor. Jason reached over and pulled the covers up over Dick, thankful he was finally asleep. Once he was sure Dick was going to stay asleep for a while, Jason took off his jacket and grabbed the smaller throw blanket at the end of Dick’s bed. He then situated himself in the large love seat chair against the wall. Jason didn’t want to have to deal with the memories associated with his old room and didn’t know what rooms were being used by Tim and Damian.   
‘Better just to stay here with Dick.’ Jason thought ‘Ya know, in case of nightmares……damn nightmares.’   
Unfortunately, nightmares would only be the start of what was to come.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the late post my son has been in the hospital (he is epileptic) but he is good now. If I have time later I will post another chapter either later or right away for this being delayed. The story is already written (and posted on another site) so it's just a matter of posting it. I see that a lot of people get comments right out of the gate but I don't seem to be getting that on any of my works. Kudos are great and I appreciate them but I want to know what is going on inside my readers minds. What are you thinking about the story? What do you think is going to happen? Do you think I am doing anything wrong? I take criticism well honestly (I'm a teacher and I have to teach about taking criticism.) So please leave comments too!

A Light in the Dark

Another Shout out to my beta Alex Skywalker  
Chapter 4

Jason awoke to an empty bedroom. He’d slept pretty well, only having awoken a couple of times from Dick’s whines and tossing and turning. Luckily Dick never fully awoke and Jason did not plan on telling Dick that he’d woken him. Jason didn’t feel the need to add more guilt to Dick’s resume of accomplishments. Jason figured, after looking at the clock, that everyone was eating breakfast so he threw the blanket off of him and headed down to the small breakfast table in the kitchen.  
Jason’s suspicions were correct; as he got closer to the kitchen he could smell what he missed most about this house: Alfred’s cooking. When he arrived in the kitchen, he saw Alfred still tinkering around the stove and Dick and Damian already seated at the table. Damian said nothing to Jason and did not seemed surprised that he was still here. Damian was whole heartedly enjoying his breakfast while Dick chose to poke and prod at it only taking a bite here and there. Sitting down between the two brothers Jason took notice of the empty chair.  
“And, where is Tim?” Jason pointed to the vacancy in question.  
“Tim doesn’t want to come down to breakfast this morning. I tried to get him to come down, but….he just wasn’t having it.” Dick said, obviously depressed over having failed at his quest.  
“And that was ok with you?” Jason challenged back.  
“No, but what do YOU want me to do Jason?”  
Jason decided to take it as it was his turn to do something. He was here to help, right?   
“OK, fine.” Jason put down his silverware and stood up, about to head to the stairwell.  
“Don’t hurt him!” Dick called after him.  
“I’m not going to hurt him. Geesh.” Jason stopped at the edge of the kitchen and turned back with a confused look on his face, pointing upwards.  
“Top of the stairs, third door on the left,” Damian replied with a mouth full of food. Jason took off to Damian’s directions.   
When Jason reached Tim’s door he pressed his ear against the door, and heard silence in response. He knocked twice then slowly entered. He was met with a sight that both shocked and frightened him. Tim was lying on the bed staring up at the ceiling. His room was a grade A disaster area. Tim was always a neat person- like OCD neat person. Jason recalled all the times Dick would complain about Tim’s neatness and voice his concerns that the boy actually had a disorder. This wasn’t the same kid Dick used to tell him about. This wasn’t the brother he’d been growing to know. As Jason stepped in the room Tim shot up off the bed in surprise.  
“Jason! When did they find you?” Tim asked.  
“Last night.”  
“And you’re still here.”  
“Surprised?”  
“No, just….I didn’t know. Something I can help you with?” Tim watched Jason slowly enter his room eyeing everything all over the floor.   
“What happened in here?”  
“You come up here to question my lack of cleanliness?”  
“No, I was commenting on the unusual lack of cleanliness. It’s breakfast time, we’re all eating downstairs.”  
“Dick didn’t tell you? I don’t want any breakfast.” Tim finally stood up all the way off his bed and Jason got a better look at Tim. Tim had definitely lost weight. He was skinny to begin with, but the way the thin white T-shirt and sweatpants hung on him looking as if they could easily fall all the way off of him, Tim looked like a skeleton. Jason continued to eye the room and the things on the floor-dirty clothes, papers, CD’s- he wondered if the things just landed there from Tim’s lack of picking them up or if they were thrown there in a fit of rage.  
“Well, breakfast isn’t optional and I’m not Dick so let’s go.”  
“Jason, I’m just not hungry.”  
“Your emaciating figure tells me otherwise. Let’s. Go. Now.”  
“Jason I’m not- UMMPHH!” Jason had picked Tim up and put him over his shoulder. Tim’s lack of weight did not surprise Jason.  
“Jason, put me down!”  
“Not until we get to the breakfast table. Now I can carry you all the way in there and let it be known to the others that is how you chose to get down there or you can walk the rest of the way. I really don’t care which but you are going down there and eating breakfast.”   
“Ok, Ok, fine I’ll walk.” Tim said as they reached the end of the upstairs hallway. Tim didn’t like the idea of Jason carrying him kicking and screaming in front of Dick- and especially in front of Damian.  
Jason set him down. He looked Tim over and knew he kept his promise: Tim was unharmed. There was a slight redness to his face, but whether that was from the blood rushing to his face or his embarrassment was anyone’s guess. The two stood there in silence, each waiting for the other to make a move.  
“After you.” Jason motioned with his hand and followed after Tim. “And after breakfast you’re taking a shower.”  
Alfred was the first to take notice of the two of them entering the kitchen. “Ahh! Master Timothy, it is good to see you up and about for breakfast.” Alfred put a plate of food in front of him, but Tim made no move to eat it. Jason grabbed Tim’s napkin and made like he was going to spread it over his lap when Tim snatched it away from him and glared at Jason.   
Jason noticed Damian was going for seconds while Dick looked like he had barely made any progress on his plate. Jason complimented Alfred’s cooking as a plate was set in front of him. Jason wondered why Dick was backsliding into not eating again. He couldn’t use the excuse he forgot; it was right there in front of him. Something was bothering Dick and Jason’s question as to what was answered when Dick spoke up.  
“We need to find a way to make it so that Gotham still knows it has a Batman looking out after them.” Dick looked like he was going to vomit. Jason’s fork paused mid-way to his mouth, astonished that this was how Dick was going to start things.  
“You mean who is going to wear father’s costume,” Damian said. Dick nodded. Damian continued: “I had assumed you would-“  
“I don’t want to. I don’t think I am the best person suited for it. I’m….I just don’t think it should be me.” A few eyes fluttered to Jason before going back to their plates full of food.  
“Don’t look at me. I’m not putting up my guns and I’m sure you don’t want a gun toting Batman out there.” Jason went back to eating.  
“You aren’t….I mean after everything you aren’t going to try?” Tim gently prodded. Jason put his fork down on the table…hard.  
“I’m not changing. This changes nothing as to who I am. Got it?!” Jason was quickly becoming agitated. “Look, Dick, let’s just eat first and we’ll figure things out a little later ok?”  
“I just thought that with everyone seated here-“  
“Later, Dick.” Jason purposefully put more force behind Grayson’s first name, almost turning it into an insult. “Alfred, come on and sit down and eat with us. We all have our plates, come on.”  
“Yah, Alfred, you’ve done enough, come sit with us.” Dick chimed in.  
“Well, I’m not sure it is proper.” Alfred started.  
“It’s proper Alfred, we want you here,” Tim piped up.  
“Well, if you insist.”  
“We do,” Jason said with a glare sent to Damian, who had yet to speak up.  
“Yes, of course, please come sit.” Damian got up and retrieved Alfred a chair. The look on Alfred’s face said it all when he sat with his four young charges. Alfred was happy as he had waited for this for a long time, yet sad as Master Bruce wasn’t here to see it.  
Dick was settled with the change of topic, having found it difficult to start the long list of things that needed to be gone over as a family. He couldn’t blame Jason for getting upset. After all, they all had had two weeks to get used to Bruce’s death. Jason had only had one night.  
Jason took notice of the amount of times Tim kept wiping his mouth with his napkin. The younger boy was being way too compliant. Jason saw Tim’s folded napkin next to his plate and reached over and unfolded it on the table. In the napkin was half chewed pieces of food.  
“Nice one. Try again,” Jason said and stood up with Tim’s napkin and threw it away. Now Tim would have no place to hide his little eating shananigans. “Just eat. You look like you need it,” Jason quietly grumbled at Tim, hoping the other’s couldn’t hear him. Finding no other way Tim ate…slowly.  
Slowly but surely the family finished eating. Jason was happy to find that Dick ended up finishing his plate. Tim left about half of his food on his plate but after what he’d seen he figured half of his plate was a success. Damian was the most successful eater of the bunch having finished a third helping. Alfred rose to start collecting the plates but Jason followed.   
“I’ll do that Alfred. Take a day off man. Go read a book, go to the gardens, do something else.” Jason smiled at Alfred as he started to collect the plates from the table. “Damian, wash the dishes.”  
“I will do no such thing.”  
Jason took three quick strides to get in Damian’s face. “I said; Do. The. Dishes.” Jason felt a hand on his shoulder. Jason grabbed the offending appendage tightly and removed it from his shoulder.  
“Come on Damian, you wash, I’ll dry; it won’t take long,” Dick appeased rubbing his now sore hand, and Jason relented.   
“Jeesh, it’s like no one’s ever asked you to do a chore,” Jason rumbled at Damian.  
“No one has,” Damian replied.  
“I’m going to go check on Tim. Hopefully he went to go take a shower,” Jason said noticing Tim was gone.  
“Glad I am not the only one to take notice that Drake smells,” Damian grumbled as he started the dishes.  
After a while, Dick and Damian were in a routine finishing up the dishes.  
“I hope you know, Grayson, that Todd is not the savior you would like him to be.”  
“And what does that mean?” Dick quirked an eyebrow at Damian.  
“He is not here to save the family. He is incapable of it.”  
“I know he isn’t here to save the family, but give him some credit; he did get Tim down to breakfast and got Alfred to sit down with us and eat.”  
“Tt.”  
“And he isn’t here to save the family; he is here to be part of the family.”  
“I hope you truly mean that, Grayson, because if you don’t, you may be doing more damage than you realize.”  
“Meaning?” Dick wondered where Damian was going with this. He certainly didn’t want to cause Jason any problems or damage and had hoped he wasn’t putting too much responsibility, too much family, too much …..everything on Jason, too soon.  
“Meaning, Todd is probably taking father’s death the worst out of all of us. He is simply the best at hiding it.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please don't forget to leave comments too!


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I posted a second chapter up today to make up for the delay in posting, so if you are one of those readers that just skips to the last chapter when something is updated make sure to check if you have read chapter 4!  
> This chapter is a little shorter but I always stop my chapters where it feels comfortable to do so.  
> It has been asked so I will put it here, there is NO SLASH in this story. Later on there will be an issue with a sexual assault but nothing in detail just words skimming on the outside of it, enough to know what it is but no detail What. So. Ever.   
> Comments! Please!  
> Shout out to my wonderful beta Alex Skywalker!

A Light in the Dark  
Chapter 5

After breakfast, Jason bounded up the stairs to check on Tim. He hoped the boy had listened to him earlier and was taking a shower. Jason slowly entered Tim’s room, happy to find the room empty and the sound of the shower running coming from the bathroom. If possible, the room looked messier than before. Jason looked around, wondering if he should clean anything up but decided against it, knowing how it would make him feel if someone went around picking things up in his room. Speaking of which, he would have to make the inevitable journey to that place at some point today.  
Jason was about to leave when he noticed a photo album open on Tim’s unmade bed. He knew it hadn’t there before, when he’d come to get Tim for breakfast. Jason sat on the bed, going through the photo album from the beginning. Jason felt like he knew Tim well enough, but hoped the photo album might help him find a way to engage with Tim-to help him past this. The photos started out with pictures of Tim and his biological father before the man had passed. He had been killed by Captain Boomerang via a boomerang to the chest. Tim had been the one to find him.   
Soon the pictures were replaced with photos of Tim and Bruce. The photos were from all over the world, their “other job” no doubt taking them there. There was the Eiffel Tower, snowcapped mountains, and other world monuments. After the pictures of Tim and Bruce were pictures of the brothers, Dick and Damian with Tim. There were even a couple of pictures of Jason in there though Tim wasn’t in those pictures. That impressed Jason; it showed him…respect. It was around the pictures of Tim with Dick and Damian that Jason started to notice that all the pictures were posed, everyone was happy,…well, Damian was the exception, though Jason could see a smiling smirk on Damian’s face in one of the pictures. There were no candid photos and Jason wondered if Tim kept those photos somewhere else. Jason knew that Tim loved to take photos, so where were all of the rest of the photos Tim took?   
After the brother came Tim’s friends. More specifically, they were of his best friends…the ones that were lost. Pictures of Tim with Bart, Connor and Stephanie. Jason noticed some marks near the photos of Connor…..wet dots…tear strains. Tim didn’t cry. Jason remembered Dick telling him that out of all of them Tim had yet to cry over Bruce’s death. Even Damian had shed a couple of tears when they had brought Bruce’s body home Dick had said. It was then that he sadly realized he had never seen Tim cry…..never. Jason thoughts turned morbid as he realized the photo album was only of the people Tim has lost in his life, with the exception of Dick and Damian. Had Tim thought he had lost them too? Or was it the family he felt he lost?  
“Jason?” What are you doing?” Tim was standing there, hair wet from the shower, bare chested but with shorts on. Now that Jason was seeing Tim without the shirt he could clearly see the outline of the boy’s ribs. Tim still retained some muscle in his arms but overall had lost a lot of….well…everything: weight, muscle; that smile, the sparkle of excitement in his eyes that he first saw on Tim as Robin in pictures.  
“Jason? You’re staring.”  
“Sorry.”  
“What are you doing?”  
“Hmmm? Oh,” Jason was embarrassed he was caught unaware. “I was just coming to check on you and came across your photo album and was just looking at it.”  
“MmmmmHmmm.” Tim picked up the photo album from in front of Jason and put it on his desk balancing it on top of a pile of junk that looked like it would fall over any second.  
“You miss your friends,” Jason started. He didn’t dare say Bruce; it was too soon, too fresh, even for Jason.  
Tim looked everywhere but at Jason, finally settling his eyes on a spot on the far wall. Tim bit his lip and simply nodded as if he didn’t trust his voice. Jason took it as a sign to continue.  
“I didn’t know them. What were they like? Were you and Connor-“  
“I don’t want to talk about this Jason.” Tim turned his back to Jason and looked out the window he was standing in front of. His prominent shoulder blades that were sticking out caused Jason’s brow to furrow in concern. Tim was shutting down.  
“Tim, I just-“  
“I’m fine. Really, Jason, I’m okay.” Tim was echoing Dick’s sentiments from when Jason first showed up to the cave.  
“No, you’re not,” Jason challenged.  
“That’s the pot calling the kettle…….look, I don’t want to fight. I’m more than happy to be your brother but I can’t be your charity case.”  
“Tim, you’re aren’t my-“  
“I don’t want to FEEL like your charity case then, ok? I think you of all people can respect that.”  
Jason’s mouth closed from it’s open and shocked position. He could understand that. He could even respect that.  
“Okay,” Jason said standing up slowly from the bed and heading for the door. He turned back before exiting. “Tim, as your brother, I’m concerned, okay? So I’d like to see you out of this room at some point today. I know we have a lot to talk over…..as a family.” Jason didn’t get a response- not that he expected one- and closed Tim’s door behind him, heading downstairs.  
When he got downstairs he found Alfred dusting some things in the living room where Damian was playing a video game.  
“Where’s Dick?” Jason asked Alfred, disappointed the older man had gone back to cleaning the first chance he got.  
“I believe, Master Jason, he had some business to take care of in the cave.”  
Jason nodded, deciding to leave Dick alone. He noticed the game Damian was playing and approached the ex-assassin.  
“I know this game.”  
“And?”  
“And, I bet I know it better than you.”  
“Tt. If you are offering a challenge, Todd, then you know I am accepting.”   
Jason grabbed a controller.  
“Prepare to have your ass handed to you.”  
“Must be nice to dream Todd.”   
Alfred could only roll his eyes at Jason’s use of foul language. It has always been Master Bruce who had chastised the young man about his bad habits. Alfred just didn’t have the heart to do it. He continued to watch his two young charges as they proceeded to the challenge of the video game, a small smile touching his lips.  
The bat’s cries echoed off the walls of the Bat-cave as Dick Grayson once again sat alone in front of the computer banks, resetting some passwords and taking care of some business. On the main computer screen a warning came up. It read:  
“It has been 2 weeks since Operation Mortalitas has been reset. Do you wish to reset or download program?”   
Dick didn’t know what to do. He knew the bat-computer was set to delete certain things if Bruce wasn’t there to reset them after a certain time, but he thought he had reset everything. Or at least that Bruce had told him everything about what would need to be reset in case of emergency. He hadn’t told him about this.   
Mortalitas……Dick knew he had heard that foreign word before. After looking it up he tentatively pressed download. Once the file finished downloading it opened and displayed across the main screen, illuminating Grayson’s face as he whispered, “Oh God.”


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A shout out to my beta Alex Skywalker. Thank you everyone who continues to read I would really like reviews/comments so that I know what exactly I am doing correctly that you guys like or if there are things to improve upon. Thanks!  
> Also I will be posting another chapter today.

A Light in the Dark

Chapter 6

After a multitude of games passed between Damian and Jason, all of which Jason unsuccessfully tried to get Alfred to partake in, Jason decided, since a couple hours had passed since his last attempt, to try and get Tim out of his room. As Jason stood and put down the controller Damian wasted no time in antagonizing his video game counterpart.  
“I see you have had your fill of losing.”  
“I go easy on small children, it’s only fair.”  
“Amusing, I always go easy on psychopaths. It is only fair.”  
Jason flashed a sarcastic smile at the younger boy before looking forlornly upstairs.  
“You will not get him to come out,” Damian stated. “ Drake has decided to handle this….situation…..in an unacceptable manner.”  
“To each his own, Damian.” Jason started up the stairs. “To each his own.”  
Jason raised his fist to knock on Tim’s door when he saw the door next to Tim’s. His door, his room. Tim’s door forgotten, Jason lowered his fist and walked to his own door. He stood at his door, forehead pressed to the dark wood, and had an internal argument with himself. He knew he had to eventually make this journey but wasn’t sure what exactly lay behind this door. The place seemed so foreign to him that he almost felt the need to knock first and ask permission to enter the foreign domain. He closed his eyes as he took a deep breath, steadied himself, and opened the door. The sight took that deep breath right out of him.   
The room was exactly how he’d left it sans some dirty clothes picked up off the floor. Posters from his favorite childhood bands adorned the wall. His bed had been made; the same sheets and comforter lay atop it. His desk was still as messy as he’d left it; a gathering of papers, pens, pictures and knick-knacks splayed around an older style computer. Someone, namely Alfred, probably came in once in a while as Jason noticed there was no dust. A pain hit Jason’s chest as he noticed the pictures of the family he used to know displayed on his nightstand alongside the box of personal belongings that had been brought to him the night he’d left to find his biological mother. The night he’d died.  
Memories, good and bad, raced through the astonishment as Jason remembered his first night in the room. He had never felt a bed so soft in his life- most of it having been spent on the street. He remembered sleeping on the floor the first few nights as he felt awkward sleeping in such a big, luxurious bed. He remembered the window he’d always snuck out of, and always got caught sneaking out of. The tree outside the window that Jason would sneak into to smoke or just look at the horizon from. He lifted his hand to his face to wipe away something wet and realized he was crying. Funny thing was he had no idea why he was crying. He didn’t’ know if it was the memories of happier, safer, more innocent times or the fact that his room had been kept the same, as if Bruce had always expected him to come home someday. Even after all the grief Jason had given the man after his resurrection, Bruce still kept the room the same. Bruce truly never gave up on Jason, the scared, yet tough little boy he once took in because he, and only him, saw something more in the boy than just the street urchin almost everybody else saw.  
Out of curiosity Jason went over and pulled open one of his dresser drawers. Sure enough, his clothes were still in there. Knowing the clothes would no longer fit him Jason knew he would have to go to his apartment and get some clothes. Probably take a shower as well.   
The emotions didn’t stop as Jason sat on the bed and bent over, his elbows on his knees and his face hidden in his hands as he drank in whatever else the room had to offer. He wasn’t sure how long he sat like that until the sound of feet made its way to the doorway.  
“Jason?” Jason’s head shot up and met the face of Tim as the younger boy slowly made his way into the bedroom. “I was just coming out of my room for something and noticed the door open,” Tim said as he sat next to Jason on the bed. Tim could see Jason’s bloodshot eyes, an indication he had been crying- or still was- but the man’s massive hands, holding his face, caught the tears, saving Jason from losing as much pride as he could allow.   
“Are you okay?’ Tim asked.  
“Yeah. I just didn’t know what to expect. I had no idea he kept everything the same.”  
Tim nodded at this. “Every once in a while Alfred comes in here to dust and air out the room and right before he does he always asks Bruce if he wants anything done to the room. Bruce always said no.”  
“Does he just want a reminder of his greatest failure?”  
“You weren’t just his greatest failure, you know. You were more than that. He was proud of what you accomplished when you were by his side. He told me himself. You don’t know what it took for him to finally agree to take me on as Robin.” Jason snorted at this. “He keeps the room the same because he always knew eventually you would come home. Even if it was just for one night, he kept that faith in you.”  
“I gotta go back to my apartment,” Jason sighed. Tim looked distressed at this. It did not go unnoticed by the older man, and he felt the need to explain in order to put the younger one at ease. “I have to shower and grab some clothes. I doubt the ones in that dresser will fit this buff bod,” Jason joked as he mockingly flexed his muscles, making Tim smile. They exited the room and headed down the stairs.  
“I’m sure Alfred will let you borrow one of the cars.” Tim led the way down the steps, keeping close to the railing as he went.  
“Cool. I left my bike a bit a ways from the entrance.”  
“Actually, Alfred brought it back and put it in the garage, but I imagine it would be hard to transport bags of clothes on a motorcycle.”  
“True. So, you said you were coming down here for something? Good that you’re out of the room.”  
“Yeah, I was hungry.”  
“Even better.” Jason smiled, hoping Tim was turning a corner and making some progress.  
When they arrived in the main room, Alfred and Damian awaited them, Alfred still cleaning and Damian still playing his video game.  
“Alfred, can I borrow one of the cars? I need to go back to my place, shower, and grab some clothes and stuff.” Jason leaned against the doorway to the kitchen where Alfred was cleaning.  
“Sure, Master Jason, although I would be more than happy to drive you.”  
“Nah, that’s ok.” Jason noticed Dick wasn’t in the room and assumed he was probably still in the cave. “Besides, someone needs to keep an eye on the video game champion here.”   
Damian snorted and stood up, facing the trio. “I am not Drake. I do not require coddling nor supervision because, unlike Drake, I can handle someone dying.”  
“Damian,” Jason warned.  
“At least I have emotions, mutant,” Tim snapped back, borrowing one of Jason’s taunts.  
“Oh yes, Drake. While I compliment you on finally smelling somewhat descent, perhaps you can now try not to waste away into nothing, like your friends and everyone else that get too close to you.” Damian stared back at Tim with a smug look on his face.  
Jason should have anticipated that Tim was going to react. Anyone would with a comment like that. But Jason was too late as Tim jumped and vaulted over the back of the couch and tackled Damian to the ground, pinning him there underneath him and hitting him twice in the face before Jason could get to him.  
“My word!” Alfred exclaimed trying to help break up the fight.   
Jason came up from behind Tim, who was growling, and tried to pull his arms back only to realize he had to first pry his hands off of Damian’s throat. While doing do he tried to talk Tim down.  
“Come on Tim, let go, he’s just doing this to get a reaction out of you.” Jason could feel Tim’s tears hitting his hands as he got them off of Damian’s throat. He pulled Tim backwards with all his strength and landed on his butt with Tim in his lap, still very upset. Jason immediately wrapped his arms around Tim’s arms, preventing him from lashing out physically as Tim launched a verbal assault and profanity at the younger boy who was sputtering on the ground, attended by Alfred.  
“Tim, sssshhh shhhh, Tim, it’s alright. Relax Tim, it’s over, it’s done.” Tim finally relaxed at the sound of Jason’s voice but continued to breath heavily. Both boys stood up and Jason passed Tim off to Alfred to look after. Tim immediately turned away from the younger boy on the ground, leaning his forehead against Alfred’s shoulders as Alfred patted his head and soothed him.  
“There’s a good lad. It’s all over with now.”  
Jason bent down and picked up Damian by the front of his sweater and hauled him around the corner. Jason didn’t intend for Tim and Alfred to hear what he had to say to Damian but he couldn’t help the way his voice carried when he was angry. Jason got close to Damian’s face, making sure he had his full attention.  
“OK, listen short shit. Don’t ever mention his friends again, got it? Did you ever stop to think that the reason Tim has lost so many friends is because he actually had some to begin with? Who do you both have now that Bruce is gone, huh? Who? Each other. The people who live in this house. So get used to it. I know you are just lashing out to keep up some sort of sick sense of normalcy, but things aren’t normal right now, are they Damian? Are they? All you both have is each other right now so let’s get this clear: you will never, EVER, do that again. Are we clear?”  
Damian did not respond. Jason really didn’t expect him to because what could he say but admit defeat and that wasn’t in his nature. Jason knew he got through to the younger boy as his eye contact with Jason never faltered. Damian slowly extracted himself from between the wall and the larger man, rounded the corner and headed up the stairs, never once looking at the room’s occupants. Damian’s exit was finalized by the slamming of his bedroom door.   
As Jason came around the corner he could tell his words to Damian had been heard by the looks on Alfred and Tim’s faces, both of whom were staring back at Jason.  
“Tim, why don’t you come with me back to my place. I could use the company,” Jason lied. After seeing his room and the emotions that came with it he preferred to be alone, plus he really didn’t want the others to know where he was living, but things were different now and the first thing on his mind was making sure Damian and Tim didn’t get into it again while he was gone. Jason already feared that Damian set back the small progress he had made with Tim.   
Tim just nodded at Jason mostly in shock from the offer. With that they grabbed their coats and were out the door.  
While driving, Jason remembered Tim saying at the house that he was hungry.  
“Wanna go get something to eat? I know this place that has the best chilidogs; they are by far my favorite.”  
“I’m not allowed to eat chilidogs,” Tim said meekly, sparing a glance at Jason.  
Shocked, Jason looked to Tim. “What? Chilidogs are the best! Who said you can’t have a chilidog…..” Jason’s voice faded out towards the end of the sentence realizing who it was that forbid chilidogs in his house. “Well damn him and his health conscious ways,” Jason laughed. Jason didn’t know if chilidogs were forbidden because of health reasons or because they were Jason’s favorite. Jason fully intended to show Tim what he was missing.  
After a few minutes of silence Jason decided to test if his progress with Tim was for naught thanks to Damian or if he could push just a little further.  
“Tim….you like taking pictures right? You have a camera and like photography?”  
“Yah.” Tim kept his answer short and simple, not knowing where Jason was going with this.  
“Well, I know you’ve probably taken a lot of pictures.”  
“Yah, you saw most of them in the photo album.”  
“You didn’t take all those- you were in most of them. But also, those were posed, rehearsed almost. As stealthy as us birds can be, I know you probably have a bunch more pictures, more candid ones where no one knows you’re watching them.”  
Tim just nodded, keeping his gaze straight ahead.  
“Well, where are they? I didn’t see them in plain sight in that disaster area you call your room.”  
“They are put away, locked away, where I can’t see them right now.”  
“Why?”   
Tim took a deep breath. So this is where Jason was going with this.  
“Candid photos are…..different. You see the person differently, how they genuinely are. When they are really sad, when they are really deep in concentration over something or when they are genuinely happy. Not like smile for the camera and you slap some fake shit-eating grin on your face. Candid photos are when they are just….them. And when they aren’t here anymore it hurts to look at that photo and know that’s the only way you will see how they really are….were anymore.”  
Jason remained silent after Tim’s answer. He hadn’t expected something so profound from the younger boy. He knew he was smart, but not psychologically smart like that. It almost made Jason scared for what Tim thought of him.  
After Jason showered and grabbed some clothes and things, and Tim and him had at least one chilidog, they ended up back at the manor. They walked into a rather tense mood in the living room. Alfred and Damian were just standing there looking distressed.  
“Alfred?” Jason asked. “Did you guys eat? We had something while we were out.”  
“Master Jason.” Was the only response given.  
Tim and Jason noticed that Alfred and Damian’s gazes were fixed on the grandfather clock, the entrance to the bat-cave. Tim, not wanting to beat around the bush spoke up.  
“What’s going on? Is Dick still down there?”  
“I’m afraid so, Master Timothy. After we ate I attempted to take a plate down to the cave, only to find the door locked and Master Richard not answering any of my calls or hails.”  
“ok, ok uhm, maybe he’s just brooding,” Jason stammered trying to think of what Dick was up to. “I mean, Dick wouldn’t do anything stupid, I mean-“ Jason’s rambling was interrupted by the grandfather clock entrance opening and Dick walking out looking worse for wear.  
“Jesus Dick!” Jason exclaimed as he walked up to him.  
Dick was pale, very pale, and had a bit of a sheen of sweat look to his face. His gate was shuffling, not at all the confident stride he normally used, and he appeared to be at a loss for words as his eyes fixed on the nothingness in front of him. Something shocked him. Something scared him, and scared him good.  
“Dick….Dick are you alright?” Jason said, snapping his fingers in front of Dick’s face to get his attention. Dick’s gaze fluttered over the various occupants in the room.  
“Oh….oh God he….he..left….he….. oh God.” And with that Dick’s eyes rolled back in his head and before Jason could catch him, Dick passed out cold on the floor.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the second chapter posted today so make sure you also read chapter 6.  
>  Another shout out to my wonderful beta Alex Skywalker. I probably overdramatized the ending of the last chapter so I hope you aren’t too mad at me for that. I am stealing a part from “Battle for the Cowl” (the message Bruce left for Jason), this is the hardest chapter so far I have had to write.  
> Warning: Though nothing is described in detail, there are allusions to child abuse and sexual abuse. I am putting this warning here in case this triggers anything for anyone.

Chapter 7

“Dick? Dick? Come on wake up!” Jason yelled all of three inches from Dick’s face, tapping it lightly. They’d managed to get Dick onto the couch and raise his legs and he was starting to get a bit of color back in his face. The rooms occupants were gathered around Dick, all concerned as to his condition and the cause of it.  
“Maybe we should try some water,” Damian suggested.  
Tim ran out and soon returned with a glass of water. He handed it to Jason who immediately threw it in Dick’s face. Dick suddenly started to sputter and move.  
“Todd, I do not believe that was the purpose of the water,” Damian scolded.  
“It worked didn’t it? Dick come on, open your eyes, wake up.” Jason continued yelling at Dick and tapping his face.   
Dick tried to swat Jason’s hands away as he woke and got his bearings.  
“Master Jason, perhaps we should all give Master Richard a little room and let him gather his thoughts.”   
They all obeyed Alfred’s order and backed up a bit as Dick woke fully and looked around at the startled yet concerned faces of his family.  
“What happened?” Dick asked, sitting up.  
“That’s what we want to know. After locking yourself in the cave for hours you show up looking like a zombie and pass out. What the hell is going on?” Jason rattled off at Dick.  
“He….there was…..Jesus….he was….” Dick tried to start but couldn’t.  
“Jesus was here?” Jason joked.  
“Careful, Master Richard, we wouldn’t want you fainting again. Drink this and take your time.” Alfred handed Dick another glass of water.   
Dick drank the water, trying to avoid eye contact with the eyes that were staring at him. Dick’s hands were shaking.  
“Dick, what was in the cave that scared you so bad?” Tim finally spoke up.  
“Bruce,” Dick stated simply.  
The shock on the other four faces was undeniable.  
“Bruce is in the cave?” All four seemed to ask at once.  
“Wait, no - well, sort of. There was a file, one of the ones that needed to be downloaded because Bruce hadn’t reset it after a certain amount of time except, he didn’t tell me about this one. I looked up the file name and it was the Latin word for death. I downloaded it and there he was. A hologram, but the most realistic thing in the world. He left messages for us…..all of us.”   
Jason looked down, feeling as if maybe he wasn’t included in that.   
“Jason, you too. You will all need to listen to your messages; I’ve already listened to mine.”  
Nobody seemed to want to be the one to step forward so Alfred decided to spare his young charges. “I suppose I will go and see what Master Bruce has to say.” And with that, Alfred left the room for the cave, leaving the others practically pacing the floor.  
After a few minutes, Alfred returned to the room. Still no one wanted to be the next to go.  
“Well, I suppose I shall see what my father has left to say to me.” Damian put on a brace face and marched down to the cave.  
“I have other duties I need to tend to as well,” Alfred said quietly, obviously affected by what was said to him in the message.  
“I’m going to go take a shower and…..think about things,” Dick said as he headed up the stairs.  
“Dick,” Jason called after him.  
“I’m fine Jason,” Dick returned without looking back and giving him just a wave of his hand.  
Jason looked back to Tim, concerned how he might be affected by Bruce’s upcoming message. “You sure you’ll be ok with this?”  
“Yah, yah, I mean, Bruce is actually the only one to leave me any sort of message after he died so it might be comforting ya know? I mean, it will be hard to see him again but, I would want to see my father again, even if it was for a message…..or Connor, Bart…..” Tim trailed off. Jason squeezed Tim’s shoulder in support.  
A few minutes later, Damian came walking in. He kept his chin about 2 inches higher in the air than normal, obviously trying to keep up a proud façade, yet failing miserably all the same. Damian glanced at the faces of Jason and Tim and knew almost immediately that they could see right through him. He flopped on the couch next to Jason, the mask dropping. Damian all of the sudden looked different. He looked younger, like the little boy he really was. He looked fragile. He looked…..human, for once.  
Tim could barely take what these messages were doing to his family. It rendered Alfred into silence, Damian into an unsure frail child, and caused Dick to lose consciousness. Tim feared what the message would do to him, or what it would do to the unpredictable Jason Todd.  
Tim almost wanted to ask Jason to go next, but he knew he had to do this sooner or later, and it might as well be sooner. He tried to remember what he’d told Jason earlier, to try and comfort himself as he stood, taking a deep breath.  
Before he walked away from the couch he stole one last glance at Jason who smiled and nodded his support. With that, Tim disappeared into the dark confines of the bat-cave.  
Jason scooted a little closer to Damian, who was staring out in front of him. Then it came. One tear, then two. Silent. No outburst. No sobbing. No noise. No nothing, except the two silent tears. Nothing more.  
“Damian,” Jason said concern laced his voice. He put a hand on the smaller boys shoulder.   
“He was proud of me. My father.” Damian kept his gaze forward not looking at Jason. “He was proud…..of me. I…..I didn’t know what it was like…..to have someone…..be proud of me.” Damian kept his voice steady, though he struggled to find the right words. No more tears came and he didn’t appear to be holding any back either.  
“What do you mean?” Jason asked, his eyes never leaving the profile of the boy’s face.  
“Ever since I could remember, from everyone I knew, it was ‘harder Damian’, ‘faster Damian’, ‘kill Damian’, ‘show no mercy Damian’. Then I come here and there’s someone…..who was proud of me…..and it wasn’t for what I was raised to be-“  
“You mean an assassin,” Jason interrupted and Damian nodded and continued.  
“But not the type of assassin for good. When I came here, I had to learn everything all over again. Same skill set, but for an entirely different cause. My father was proud of me for fighting for his cause, the good cause. My mother…..the League of Shadows never expressed gratitude or pride towards one fighting for their cause.”  
“I’m not surprised; they aren’t exactly known for that.”  
“But…..he was proud of what I had done. He said he had known it wasn’t easy for me. He was proud of me.”  
Jason was taken aback. He had never seen Damian like this before; the boy was truly shocked that Bruce was proud of him. He had never experienced someone being proud of him. It was a feeling he obviously liked, but was mournful that the man hadn’t been able to express his pride for his son before it was too late.  
Jason took another scoot closer to Damian and tentatively wrapped a large arm around the small boy’s shoulders.  
“He had every right to be proud of you. He should be. And, know that though we don’t always express it to one another, Bruce isn’t the only one who is proud of you.”  
“I don’t know what to make of this,” Damian said as his brow furrowed. Jason kept his arm across Damian’s shoulders steady and squeezed. It was no secret Damian was not used to emotions; this must’ve been difficult for him to handle and process. Jason had never seen Damian express any emotions and now so many different emotions compounded on the boy at once.  
“You may not know what to make of it for a while. Bruce was a complicated man. We don’t live ordinary lives, so this isn’t the simplest nor easiest thing for us to process.”  
“Do you know what to make of your relationship with our father? Of your closure with it?”   
As Damian finally looked at Jason the use of the term ‘our father’ did not go un-noticed by the older one. Before Jason could think of a response, the grandfather clock entrance opened with a bang and a blur, almost unrecognizable as one Tim Drake, sped past them, up the stairs, and into his bedroom with a slam of the door. Jason heaved a big sigh. This wasn’t good. He needed to go to him yet he didn’t want to leave the young boy in front of him who was finally making a break through.  
“You okay?” Jason asked Damian.  
“Yes, I just need to….process. Go to Drake; all we have is each other, correct?”  
Jason smiled at the young boy as he squeezed his shoulders.  
“That’s why he’s proud of you.”   
As Jason stood and went for the stairs, Damian decided to go to the library. It was by far the quietest area of the house, which would allow Damian the silence to meditate on these new found feelings.  
Jason arrived at Tim’s door and knocked, not surprised when he didn’t receive a response.  
“Tim, come on, open the door. Please?”   
No response.   
Jason had no idea what the message was that Tim received, but it had obviously struck something within him that caused him to close right back up again. Jason prayed that Tim wasn’t stupid enough to do…..well, something stupid.  
“Come on, Tim. I at least need to know you’re ok.” Silence. “Ok, that’s stupid. I mean ok like you can come to the door and at least look at me ok.”   
After a couple of seconds Jason heard some fumbling around and footsteps heading towards the door. Tim opened the door just a few inches. Enough for about half of his face to be seen. Tim looked at Jason through the crack in the door, evidence all over his face that he had been crying.  
“Tim? Everything ok? Do you want to talk about it?”   
Tim shook his head. “I’m fine,” He mumbled and shut the door and locked it again.   
Jason let his head sink, distraught over letting down one boy while having success with the other. This family was so confusing.  
“You should be happy he even did that. He doesn’t even open the door for me when he shuts down.”   
Dick’s voice startled Jason. He looked up to see Dick leaning against a bedroom door a few feet away. He was dressed in sweats and a towel was draped over his neck, obviously having freshly showered.   
“I believe you’ve procrastinated enough; isn’t it your turn to go downstairs? I’ll try to get Tim out.”  
“Damian needs some talking to also.”  
Dick nodded his head as Jason walked away to what he was positive was his certain doom.  
The cave held gloominess in all the senses. The darkness, the screeching of the bats, the damp smell that seemed to seep through the pores of your skin. It wasn’t a place you would associate with happy memories or good times. Jason was sure that wasn’t about to change. The young man recalled being in the cave the first time he wore his Robin outfit, about to go on patrol for the first time, excitement and anticipation pouring through his soul.   
“This is the happiest day of my life.”  
Jason sat in the large bat chair, suddenly feeling like a small child dwarfed by the large chair. The file was right where Dick said it was and he entered in his birth date as the password.  
The three large screens separated and moved upwards. The sudden large movement startled Jason and he gripped the arms of the chair, ready to use them as a method of propulsion should he need to run. The large middle screen soon was facing the ground and a light projected from the screen to the ground. Its light leaked through the gloominess, casting a glow on the haunted man’s face. The light soon formed into a hologram of Bruce Wayne. A very realistic looking Bruce Wayne.   
Jason leaned back in the chair, feeling like Bruce was suddenly right in front of him. He could now understand why Dick, who was still reeling from Bruce’s death, was so spooked by this realistic version of Bruce. The hologram was paused, waiting for Jason’s command to start. But Jason just sat and looked at the older man.   
Bruce was wearing the Bat-suit with the cowl pulled down. His eyes and face were downcast and somber, no doubt due to the tone of the message. Jason wondered if Bruce recorded the message for him when he recorded the messages for the others or if he waited until…..other events had occurred. Jason took a deep breath and pressed play.  
The hologram looked up and seemed to look right at Jason…..right through Jason.  
“Jason by now you’ve been told of my death and you’re probably surprised to be invited back to the cave-“  
“Surprised is an understatement old man…..but it wasn’t you who invited me back.” He couldn’t help but voice his thoughts aloud to the realistic incantation as if he were talking to the actual man.  
“-But like Tim, Dick, and Damian I’m leaving you with the one thing I can’t give anymore…..advice.”  
“Oh shit, so this is the path we are going to go down. There are five million other things you could leave me with besides advice.”  
“Of all my failures, you have been my biggest.”  
“No shit; but do you realize why, Bruce.”  
“I take full responsibility for your wayward and self-destructive path in life.”  
“Gee, give me some credit too there, Bruce.”  
“You were broken and I thought I could put the pieces back together. I thought I could do for you what could never be done for me, make you whole.”  
“I was broken long before I met you, Bruce. I was never going to be whole, no matter what you did…..or didn’t do.”  
“What happened to you as a child-“  
“Don’t go there Bruce.”  
“-the terror-“  
“Don’t!”  
“-the pain-“  
“Stop it!”  
“-the horrors-“  
“Don’t Bruce!!!!!”  
“-but that secret is one that neither of us should have kept.”  
“NOOOOO!!!” Jason screamed, throwing his fists down on the counter in front of him, the chair toppling to the ground behind him. Jason came to his knees and wept as the secret…..the abuse…..played through Jason’s mind. Hands, touching, tears, lips, teeth, pressure, pain, and only the feeling of shame left over as the sound of money hitting the mattress echoed through the haze - all of it so he could have a meal for the night. Sometimes he didn’t even have the sound of money assuring him of food to accompany the shame. Bruce’s hologram continued.  
“You needed repair and instead I gave you an outlet to act out on, for that I apologize.”  
“STOOOP!!!”  
Deep in the shadows a pair of eyes watched Jason fall apart in front of the image of his mentor and father figure. He felt guilty for intruding upon this very private time for Jason, but Dick wanted to know how Jason would react, what the uncovering of this unknown secret would do. Dick would never tell his brothers that in secret he listened to all of their messages before going back upstairs to the house. He wanted as much time with Bruce as possible. But now, Dick didn’t know if he did the right thing by telling Jason he had a message – didn’t know whether he set him on a path to redemption or on a path straight to hell. Dick wanted to go to Jason but knew he would be pushed aside and ultimately Jason would be pissed that he was ever there to begin with.  
Bruce’s image continued as Jason, still on the floor, cried out.  
“But it’s not too late for you to get the proper healing you never received, it’s not too late for me to help you. It’s time for you to stop what you’re doing. Alfred knows of a brilliant doctor who-“  
“ENOUGH!” Jason rose to grab the first thing he could - a bat-a-rang - and threw it at the hologram of Bruce. It flew straight through the image and embedded itself into the wall behind it.  
“AAAHHH!!!” Jason screamed in emotional pain and frustration as he punched the computer board as hard as he could before sinking back to the floor. The image stopped playing and turned off, casting the cave into darkness, Jason’s cries and screams the only thing echoing off the cave walls.  
The watching pair of eyes closed.  
Hell it is, then.


	8. Chapter 8

A Light in the Dark

 

Chapter 8

The remainder of the night, after everyone had seen the message Bruce left for them, was quiet and uneventful. Each person escaped to their own retreat, whether it be to the sanctuary of their own room, the peacefulness of the library, or the familiarity of the kitchen. They stayed that way for a few days, keeping their distance, yet staying close to each other in the manor. It would be the last time the manor was uneventful for some time.  
A few days later found everyone at the breakfast table – all of them, thankfully, eating. Everyone seemed to want to say something but no one knew how to start. After a long sigh, Dick spoke up.  
“We need to start patrolling.”  
“As who?” Damian asked with a mouthful of food.  
“As ourselves, as we always have for now. Gotham can’t handle the disappearance of all of us. We’ll figure out the rest later. Damian, you have training, go get ready.”  
Damian did as he was told with Tim excusing himself as well to his own room at the mention of Damian training with Dick. Jason was left at the table with his older brother.  
“I notice you’re training with Damian a lot these past few days,” Jason spoke up. He kept his eyes downcast, sitting back in his chair.  
“He needs it. Especially after what you told me happened between him and Tim that day. For discipline, if nothing else.”  
“Who will he be patrolling as?”  
“As…himself…as he always has before. Why? What are you getting at?”  
Jason finally met Dick’s eyes. “Just curious what your future plans are for him. Especially since I don’t doubt Tim is also noticing how much you are training with him.”  
“I don’t know yet. I don’t know a lot of things lately.”  
“You mean about taking up the cowl? What did Bruce have to say to you? Did he mention anything about it?”  
Dick nodded. “He gave me his blessing, but didn’t pressure me. He left the decision up to me. I kind of wish he hadn’t. It would have been a lot easier if he would have said don’t do it or please do it.”  
Jason nodded at that; Dick had never been good with indecision - the pressure of having to make a big decision on his own. Probably from years of trying to please Bruce. After a few moments of silence, Dick continued.  
“What did Bruce say to you?” Dick tested.  
Jason sat forward in his chair, keeping his emotions in check. “What I expected. Stop what you’re doing, blah, blah blah, bullshit, bullshit, bullshit.”  
“About that. I want you out on patrol with us. But, I need it to be by our rules. No killing.”  
“Trying to change me already? Maybe I just shouldn’t go if you are just going to play Daddy Bats with me.”  
Dick put his hands up in mock surrender.  
“I’m not playing Daddy Bats with you, but I’ve always believed the same things he has. All I’m saying is IF you come patrolling with us…no killing. So, is that all Bruce said?” Going back to testing Jason.  
“Yes…nosy shit. If you have something you want to say, Dick, just say it.”  
“Alright, you’ve been…..distant from us. A bit abrasive and accusing when you do talk to us. Just wondering if something was said that pissed you off. You’ve changed since hearing Bruce’s message.”  
The same memories raced through Jason’s mind as when Bruce mentioned ‘the secret’ hands touching him, a child’s voice screaming to make it stop - and Jason was determined that the secret remain just that, so he decided to play into Dick’s accusatory and abrasive accusation.   
“Jason?” Dick called, bringing Jason out of his thoughts.  
“No, and as a matter of fact, I’ve done more these past couple of weeks than you or most others here! I got a lot further with Tim than-“  
“Jason! Stop! Geesh, I was just asking,” Dick tried to soothe, not wanting to test Jason any further.  
“I’m going out for a smoke,” Jason said as he stood up and headed towards the door.  
“That’s the other thing: the bad habits you’re starting up again and going back to.”  
Unable to say anything else Jason said the only thing he could. “Fuck off, Dick.”  
“Nice, real nice. This is exactly what I’m talking about!” Dick called after Jason as the back door from the kitchen slammed.  
About a week went by and not much changed in the manor. Tim still hid in his room, no one knowing what he spent so much time doing up there. Alfred puttered around the house. Jason was abrasive and grew more distant. Damian actually acted somewhat normal, leaving everyone alone and throwing himself into school and training. Dick was busy now, being the one to try and keep the family together, and was actually making strides with Damian in his training. Dick hoped that if shit hit the fan, Damian would stay this way and not go back to the cocky shit he was capable of being.   
Tonight all four were going out on patrol together - the first time they’d all gone out together. All the major crime villains were behind bars, but there had been word about “shipments” and someone needing more for a shipment or trade. Only problem was, they didn’t know who the players were. Since no big names were mentioned they figured it was lower time thugs trying to up their name in the drug trade and shipment business while big names like the Black Mask were imprisoned.  
The word was they were looking for more of the shipment tonight, in the crime alley section of Gotham. It was a familiar area as most drug deals went done down there, and they figured they needed more drugs for a shipment and were looking for more drugs from lower time drug dealers in order to complete the shipment.  
After spending some time listening, and investigating they found the alleyways they would probably be dealing in. They were a couple of alleyways that connected together, a couple of the tell- tale windowless vans parked in the alleyway so they could do the deals without being seen. Thugs lined the walls and hid in places in the alleyways and the birds could tell they were all packing. Only problem was, there wasn’t any talk or sign of drugs. Just the ‘shipment’ and ‘only needing one’ One what? Drugs weren’t dealt in ones.  
The birds kept high on the corner rooftops. Damian stayed with Dick on one while the rooftop to the right held Tim, now dressed as Robin. Jason, in his complete Red Hood gear, was across from them. Dick could tell Jason was packing, despite his promise to Dick right before they left to play by the rules. Jason insisted the guns were just for intimidation, yet refused to hand over the ammunition, stating “What good would an unloaded gun be for intimidation? These guys can tell when it’s loaded and when it’s not.”  
“I don’t like this- it isn’t right. Since when are drugs dealt in ones? Could this be weapons we’re talking about here?” Tim asked, ever the detective.  
“I don’t know, but we aren’t going to leave not knowing what we’re dealing with. Jason? What do you think?” Dick’s voice came across the communicator.  
“Not sure either. How about I go take a closer look?”  
“How about not,” Dick shot back.  
“If you two are done bickering like mother hens there appears to be a new player in the alleyway,” Damian scolded.  
“Shit, it’s a kid! What’s a kid doing here? Could he be the dealer?” Jason asked.  
“You think a kid could be the dealer?” Tim asked.  
“Trust me, it’s possible,” Jason replied.  
“I don’t have a good look at him; Dick? Damian?” Tim worried.  
“He isn’t part of this,” Dick spoke up. “He is way too unsure of himself, hands in his pockets, looking around….. I don’t like it.”  
“Could be just a first timer?” Damian asked.  
The small boy, around Damian’s age, walked slowly, yet with a purpose of getting across the alleyway. One of the hiding thugs came from a back doorway and approached the kid, resulting in the latter taking a few steps back. The large thug showed his hands and beckoned the small child over. Out of fear, stupidity, or both the kid approached him and the thug leaned down and whispered something in the boy’s ear. The kid went wide eyed and backed up a couple steps, to which the thug grabbed the boy’s arm. The thick, large fingers dug into the small arm, giving the kid no chance to break free and run away.  
The back doors of the van opened from the inside, but no one could get a view of how many or what exactly was inside the back of the van.  
Jason’s anxious voice came over the communicator. “No, this kid’s in trouble, I’m going in!”  
“No! Jason, wait! We don’t know what’s in the van!” Dick cried softly so as not to be heard.  
“Do we follow him?” Damian asked.  
“No, hold tight. Jason can take care of himself, he can get the kid out of there. Hold until we see how they react and what is in the van. If we move now, we won’t find out what this is all about,” Dick ordered.  
Tim seemed to question this though. “You do realize they have weapons- like, the type that fire bullets?”  
“So does Jason,” Dick replied.  
“You allowed Todd, unstable as he is, to accompany us on patrol with loaded weapons? I must question your call and your sanity in this matter,” Damian said, looking at Dick with both shock and scorn.  
Jason got down to the street level and came up behind the thug holding the boy. He lunged forward out of the darkness, from behind the thug, and wrapped an arm tight around the thug’s neck, pulling him back. The other hand held a loaded gun, pointed straight at the thug’s head. The thug dropped his gun in surprise, but did not release his grip on the boy. Unfortunately, up top the others could not hear what was being said between Red Hood and the thug.   
On the ground, Red Hood and the thug went back and forth, Red Hood trying to get the thug to release the boy. Red Hood pressed the thug forward, questioning his purpose with the kid. They finally pushed forward enough to see inside the back of the van. The two occupants on the van were in the front seat and paid no attention to what was going on behind them. But when Jason saw what was in the back on the van he couldn’t help himself. The pain, the rage, the horror that he felt as a child, the ‘secret’ filled him once again. He closed his eyes to the images that assaulted him and made his decision.   
Jason took a step back and shot the thug in the head, killing him instantly. This caused a multitude of reactions to occur at once.  
The dead thug fell to the ground, the now released boy running away, the occupants of the van realizing they’d been had floored it out of the alleyway, while the Red hood unloaded his weapon at the van. The occupants up top on the roof were shocked and powerless to stop what had just occurred.  
“Jesus Christ,” Dick whispered.  
“What the hell made him do that? The guy was unarmed!” Tim spoke up from his new position next to Damian and Dick.  
“Do we go in now?” Damian asked.  
Dick merely nodded as the three went to street level to find a pissed off, out of breath Red Hood. Dick went over to him and grabbed Jason’s shoulder to turn him around to face them. Jason angrily knocked Dick’s arm away from him. “Don’t. Touch. Me”  
“What the hell, Jason? What was that about?” Dick asked.  
“Don’t. Don’t do that. You’re blaming yourself. This wasn’t you. I did it and I sure as hell don’t regret it. You don’t know what he said. You don’t know what I saw, what was in the back of the van, what they planned to do to that kid. I saved his life and many others you can thank me later,” Jason growled at Dick, no more than three inches from his face.  
“Well then enlighten us! You’re lucky none of us were seen; I wouldn’t even know how to explain that to Commissioner Gordon!”  
“Yah, Yah, you’re in the clear, good for you,” Jason said.  
Tim stepped forward, careful not to touch Jason in this state.  
“Jason, seriously, what happened?”  
Jason ignored Tim’s question and walked out of the alley.  
“Jason!” Tim called again.  
“Shouldn’t you all go somewhere? As Dick said you wouldn’t want Commissioner Gordon to catch you here.” And with that, Jason walked out of the alleyway.  
Dick couldn’t stop staring at the dead body.  
“Let’s go,” Dick croaked out. The three men left the alleyway, the only victim, left alone on the alley floor.   
“Oh Jason, what have you done…and why?” Tim thought to himself.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> One step forward and two steps back. Jason and Tim have a disagreement/fight.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shout out to my beta Alex Skywalker! As always I would love reviews. Kudos and Bookmarks are nice but comments tell me if what I’m doing is ok. Though it may seem like it this is NOT the last chapter. Still have a ways to go.  
> COMMENT PLEASE!!! Let me know what I am doing well or not well. Comments help me so PLEASE COMMENT!!!

A Light in the Dark

Chapter 9  
When Dick, Tim and Damian returned to the cave, Dick honestly didn’t know whether or not to expect Jason to be there or not but, as Dick parked his bike, with Tim doing the same behind him, Jason was sitting at the bat-computer looking through mug-shots on the giant screen. Dick felt Damian let go of his waist, the boy having had to hold on through the bumpy road on the way to the cave. Dick faced his youngest two brothers and signaled them to go upstairs. This was yet another confrontation with Jason he was going to have to have alone.  
“Be sure to check his weapons,” Damian murmured peeling off his standard domino mask he wore while patrolling, and slinking up the stairs.   
Tim took off his helmet and was next to approach Dick. “Just…just try to see…” Tim sighed struggling with his words. “There has to be a reason,” Tim finally ground out as he walked past Dick.   
Dick caught him by the shoulder before he reached the stairs. “Be sure to get something to eat,” Dick said to Tim, noticing how the usually skin tight uniform still sagged a bit on his frame. Dick still worried for Tim. He worried for all of them.  
Dick set his eyes on his current worry, his immediate younger brother.  
“Jason we need to talk about this,” Dick said stepping up the platform where Jason was seated.  
“Busy,” Jason provided the one word answer simply.  
“Let me help you,” Dick offered trying to go for a peaceful solution.   
Jason raised his eyebrow at this and glared at Dick sideways, wondering how much the first Boy Wonder knew, his offer for helping sounding so familiar. “No thanks,” Jason finally replied. “You seemed pretty comfortable distancing yourself from the situation.”  
“No the situation, just the methods used. What happened Jason? What did he say? What was in the van? Talk to me.” Dick took a step towards Jason and put a hand on his shoulder and tried to turn Jason to face him. Jason quickly shook off Dick’s hand which came right back onto Jason’s shoulder more forcefully to turn Jason around.   
Jason shot up out of the chair and turned to Dick with the intent to shove him away but as Jason faced Dick, Dick came at him with escrima sticks in hand, either too quick for Jason or having expected what Jason was going to do. Dick shoved Jason backwards until his rear hit the corner of the computer and was toppled, his back hitting the keyboard. Dick was right there, one stick against Jason’s throat, the other pushing against his shoulder. Leverage was on Dick’s side and it was what kept Jason in place.  
“Let go of me!” Jason roared.  
“Talk to me! Tell me what you know!”  
“Get! Off! Of! Me!” Jason enunciated each word as loud as he could.  
Dick could see Jason’s eyes widen behind his domino mask, hear his breath quicken, and felt something. Jason was shaking….trembling, and not out of anger. Deciding this way wasn’t going to get him answers, Dick took a step back allowing Jason to get up. When Jason stood he turned away from Dick, struggling to keep himself from a full blown panic attack. Dick gave Jason his space and a few moments to compose himself before speaking…more calmly this time.  
“Jason? What did they want? What did they need for the shipment?”  
Jason knew Dick wasn’t going to drop this and, deciding to make his life a little easier, he tore down one small wall.  
“The kid. They wanted the kid.”  
“I don’t…you mean…trafficking? We didn’t get any intel supporting that, Jason. Are you sure-“  
Jason shouted and kicked over the chair next to the computer, Dick jumping out of its path. Jason did not want to have to explain this.  
“YES! I’m sure!” Again Jason turned away from Dick, causing the older man to worry more.  
“Jason…what was in the van?”  
“A mattress,” Jason croaked out. “A goddamn mattress.” Jason looked on the verge of tears.   
Dick’s eyes widened. Jason was sure, and Jason’s resulting actions in the situation sealed the deal for what Dick was hoping wasn’t true about ‘the secret.’ Jason started walking toward the stairs, stopping and needing a balance check. Dick started towards him but Jason just put up his hand, Dick again noticing now that he didn’t want to be touched.  
“Just…tired,” Jason finished and headed up the stairs.   
That night, from next door, Dick could hear Jason’s nightmares.  
The remainder of the week went without incident. Dick took over the incident details and the thugs were apprehended with the information Dick, as Nightwing, gave to Commissioner Gordon.  
Jason had calmed down, yet still kept his distance, only being grouchy if someone got to close, and not just physically.  
The only minor incidents involving Jason were his buffed offer of help once Dick finally decided to go to Jason after hearing him in the throes of a nightmare, and once with Damian over something with a videogame. The mothers were brought into the insults and Dick had to shut Damian up before he came up with a response to the mother comment. Dick feared how Jason would have reacted to a comment about a family member before…well before this life.  
After that Jason had been calm and quiet, even down right nice a few times. He even got Alfred to sit down for more than five minutes and Dick had hoped Jason had moved past things.   
Elsewhere throughout the week Damian stuck close to Dick, training whenever they could and Tim…poor Tim…kept his distance, quiet, either staying in his room or stuck like glue to his laptop when he was out of his room (something he did only to please Jason). When asked what he was working on, Tim would discreetly and quickly change the screen and say he was just playing a game. This usually prompted Damian to challenge Tim by telling him if he would play less games and train more he would be a more effective Robin. After his earlier incident with Damian, Tim refused to allow himself to rise to the bait again and would merely roll his eyes and go back to his ‘games.’  
Unfortunately the peace wasn’t to last by the end of the week.  
Jason came downstairs to Damian lounging on the armchair, oblivious to the world, playing a game on his phone. Tim was lying across the couch watching a TV show and looking at his laptop resting on his lap. Jason came to the end of the couch to sit down and, finding Tim’s legs in the way, tapped said legs silently, asking them to move. Tim scrunched up his legs giving Jason room to sit.   
Jason noticed that the television show Law and Order SVU was playing. A little boy was on the screen detailing things that had been done to him. Jason attempted to keep the memories at bay, not wanting to lose it in front of the younger two.   
Jason reached for the remote, about to change the channel when Tim said, “I’m watching that,” never taking his eyes off his laptop screen.  
“No, you’re not, you’re watching your computer,” Jason replied.  
“I’m watching both.”  
“You can’t be watching both.”   
“Well I am.”  
“Well you’re not. You don’t even know what’s going on in the show.”  
“Young kid, being abused, probably sexually, mom didn’t seem to care much considering she cared more about her drugs.” Tim never even looked up from his laptop while spewing his unknown venom at Jason.  
“STOP!” Jason screamed unable to take the similarities screaming in his head, and finally laid down an ultimatum, unable to take the television mocking him in the background, “Pick one,” he ground out.  
“Fine, the TV,” Tim said going back to his laptop with an attitude.  
“Fine then, you don’t need this,” Jason said as he stood, taking Tim’s laptop with him and throwing it down on the ground as hard as he could. The laptop skidded into the corner in two pieces, parts of it sparking. Jason walked off satisfied.  
“What the hell, Jason!” Tim yelled, storming off after Jason, finally reaching him and pulling on his arm trying to get Jason to face him. “Why the hell did you do that?” Tim yelled again, angry that his precious work was gone. Tim continued to pull on Jason’s arm, yelling at him, not able to see Jason’s face, twisting with anger and a changing temperament.  
Jason then turned and plowed Tim in the side of the face with a powerful fist. Tim went down and went down hard.   
Dick, hearing the argument from upstairs, saw the punch from the top of the stairs and ran to Tim who was lying on the floor, still trying to regain his senses while holding his head.  
“Tim, let me see. Are you alright? Tim, move your hand and let me see,” Dick pleaded, trying to help Tim before turning to Jason. “What the hell, Jason!”  
Jason, still fuming, yelled at Tim; “Don’t you ever touch me; what the hell is your problem!” Jason then stepped forward and kicked Tim in the lower back as he yelled.   
Tim squirmed and cried out at the kick.   
Dick positioned himself over the other side of Tim so Jason couldn’t touch the younger boy again without touching him first and glared murderously at Jason.  
“Jason!” Dick warned.   
Jason turned and headed out the back kitchen door, slamming it behind him. Behind Dick, Tim was trying to sit up. Damian, having watched the scene from the love seat, turned around and went back to the game, satisfied that the commotion was over. Dick turned back to Tim to help him up.  
“Come on, let’s go put something on that,” He said, looking at the bruise starting to form on the side of Tim’s face. Dick led Tim to a kitchen stool and helped him sit. As Dick put his hand on the small of Tim’s back the boy hissed and winced. Dick pulled up Tim’s shirt slighty to see a lovely footprint shaped bruise starting to form there as well. “Aaaannnd I will get you something for that too,” Dick said as he went to the freezer for the ice packs.   
Tim settled his head in his folded arms across the counter with a groan. Dick looked through the freezer thinking to himself. ‘Damn him, what was he thinking?’ Jason easily had more muscular weight than the other brothers. Whereas Dick relied on his cat-like acrobatics and Tim his detective work, Jason relied on his brute strength. With Tim the way that he was, underweight and all, Jason easily had an advantage over him and it no doubt hurt Tim physically as well as emotionally when Jason hit and kicked him with all of his might.  
Dick found the ice packs and closed the freezer door, spying Jason from the kitchen window. Dick was shocked that Jason had stuck around as he was used to seeing Jason run away from his problems. Jason wasn’t too far away from the house, standing in the snow, lighting a cigarette. Jason staying, Dick assessed, meant that he felt guilty for what he did and the reason he did it was the same reason why he didn’t run…he was hurting too and Dick knew he needed to talk to him.  
Dick knew that the loss of Bruce confused Jason but dammit, why did he have to lash out like this?  
Dick, with the icepacks, walked over to Tim, who still had his head down in his arms. Dick situated one of the ice packs on his back by the elastic waistband of his sweatpants. The sudden coldness on the wound startled Tim, causing him to sit up straight.  
“Sorry, sorry,” Dick murmured. “Look, why don’t you go lay down for a bit; I’ll be up a little later to check on you.”   
Tim was about to protest but Dick beat him to it. “You look like the walking dead, you are so tired. Plus I noticed you didn’t even try to dodge that punch.”  
Tim rolled his eyes to so obviously keep the tears in and made his way upstairs, declining Dick’s offer of help.  
Dick instead went outside and approached Jason cautiously. “OK Jason, what’s up? What’s the problem?” Dick asked. Jason just shook his head, unable to answer. Dick continued, “He really doesn’t need that, you know, Jason, we’re supposed to be helping him! I know you’re hurting too Jason.”   
And with that, Jason started to walk back to the house before the mushy stuff started, but Dick kept on. “I’m not a mind reader. I don’t know what you are thinking, but you can’t lash out like this when we need you.”   
Jason turned around with his hands in the air, exasperated. “I’ll apologize to the kid, alright? Happy?” and Jason went into the house, stomping his cigarette out first. Dick let him go, knowing that was as good as he was going to get out of Jason Todd.  
Jason went to Tim’s room and slowly opened the door as he knocked on it. Tim was laying on his right side on the bed. He stared at the wall directly ahead of him. One ice pack remained situated on his back, the other one half falling off the left side of his face not fully covering the now glaring bruise there. Jason slowly and cautiously entered Tim’s still messy domain. He really hated this.  
“Ok…uh…look.” Jason looked at Tim who was still just lying there, staring at the wall, not acknowledging Jason. Jason walked around the side of the bed, trying not to wince as he caught sight of the bruise on his brother’s face. “I’m sorry, alright? My bad. Ok? I’ll replace your shit, ok?” Jason’s arms went up and down before finally falling and slapping his thighs on the way down. Jason couldn’t do this.   
He walked out the door, but before he could close the door behind him he saw Dick leaning against the hallway wall directly across from the doorway. Dick had his arms crossed over his chest and was looking oh so smugly as Jason.  
‘What?’ Jason silently mouthed at Dick. Dick just held his stare which communicated everything. It said “He-doesn’t-just-need-an-apology-he-needs-an-explanation-he-needs-you-to-talk-to-him’. Jason exhaled slowly and looked at the floor before slowly turning back into Tim’s room and closing the door behind him. ‘ok, ok, how to do this.’ He thought to himself. Jason forced himself to look at Tim and sit slowly on the end of his bed.  
“Look, Tim, this isn’t your fault. It’s me. I lash out at everything and even nothing at all, all because I can’t deal with things and I totally…..ignored….what you’re going through in the process. I’m-“ Jason tried to swallow past the pain and guilt. “I’m just an asshole, ok? I’m an asshole and I did an asshole thing…because…that’s what I do. I’m sorry I’m an asshole.” And with that Jason stood up and headed for the door again. He almost got there when a quiet voice spoke from the bed.  
“No, you’re not.”   
Jason’s hand froze as it reached for the doorknob, thinking that he heard wrong. He looked back at the bed. Tim still wasn’t acknowledging him. He was still staring at the wall with that blank, haunted look; the only look his eyes were able to produce anymore.  
“What?” Jason asked, taking a few steps towards Tim.  
“You’re not an asshole,” Tim repeated a bit louder, yet not moving.   
‘How could the kid not think I was an asshole after what I did?’ Jason thought. Jason slowly walked in front of Tim and knelt down in front of him, though Tim still looked at the wall, through Jason, never faltering. Jason again had to remind himself not to wince catching another glimpse of the bruise.  
“Tim…I-“ Jason wasn’t able to continue.  
“Jason, you’re not an asshole. It would actually be a lot easier if you were but…you’re not. It’s why I kept asking you why you did what you did. If you were an asshole I could just chalk it up to you broke my laptop because you’re an asshole and I would have left it at that. But, you aren’t which is why I wanted an answer….and I guess I got one.”  
“Tim, I am sorry.”  
“Jason, the answer was that you did what you did because you are hurting too and you just don’t want to admit it and this is what you do when the hurt gets too close or too real.”  
“Then why ask me why I did it?’  
“Because I wanted you to see it. How we all do different things when we hurt. Damian puts things logically, Alfred works, Dick takes control, and you lash out.”  
Jason noticed Tim left himself off the list of the coping mechanisms of the family.   
Tim then continued. “And, I get why you lash out, because this can’t be easy for you either, because I know you aren’t big on feelings or anything, but this is probably a bit harder on you because of your strained relationship with Bruce. You didn’t really get any closure.”  
Jason marveled slightly at how right Tim was, which compounded his guilt exponentially at what he had done. Jason slowly reached up for the ice pack, thankful that Tim didn’t flinch, and put the ice pack fully on the bruise. Tim then finally made eye contact with Jason, communicating forgiveness with the glance as Jason saw the dried tear tracks lining Tim’s face.  
“I am so sorry Tim,” Jason said sincerely and got up and left. This time Dick wasn’t waiting for him outside the door.   
Jason knew where Dick would be though and made a quick entrance into Dick’s room without knocking and saw Dick sitting on the end of his bed. Jason stayed in the doorway. “I…uh talked with the kid,” Jason said. Dick merely nodded. “He’s pretty…observant. Seems to know a lot about us; knows how each of us acts when we hurt.”  
“What did he say?” Dick’s eyes rose to meet Jason’s for a brief moment, only to drop to the floor again. Dick was tired, and it showed.  
“He said Damian puts things logically, Alfred works, you take control and I lash out. But he never said what he does, when he hurts. How does he cope?”  
Dick’s eyes never left the ground with his answer.  
“He doesn’t”  
A cold chill crept up Jason’s spine and he nodded at Dick’s answer and turned and left, closing Dick’s door behind him.  
The next day on his bed Tim found a brand new, state of the art, all the bells and whistles laptop. It even had a bow on it. Tim knew exactly who it came from and ran to Jason’s room to thank him. But, as he entered Jason’s room he noticed that the things Jason had brought with him weren’t there. Jason had left. Jason was gone.

…..to be continued


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Told you I wasn’t done. Shout out to Alex Skywalker my wonderful beta!  
> Chapter is a little bit shorter than the others but hopefully still just as good. I made up the Previso laptop name.  
> PLEASE GIVE ME REVIEWS, THEY HELP ME KNOW WHAT TO DO (AND INSPIRE ME TO WRITE)  
> SO PLEASE REVIEW!!!! LET ME KNOW WHAT YOU LIKED AND WHAT YOU DIDN’T LIKE!

A Light in the Dark

 

Chapter 10

Tim stood in Jason’s doorway in shock. His dark eyes scanned the room once, twice, even three times hoping to see something indicating that Jason was still there- or at least he was coming back. Jason couldn’t be gone.  
Dick watched Tim from his own doorway. He saw the excitement and even the hint of a smile on Tim’s face as he opened Jason’s door only for the boy’s shoulders to slump, the color in his face drain, and that hint of a smile all but disappear as the door fully opened and Tim saw Jason had left.  
Dick approached Tim slowly, unsure of how the younger boy would take his presence at this time. Tim heard Dick’s footsteps approaching behind him, Dick making no attempt to be stealthy.  
Dick put his arm around Tim’s shoulders, not saying anything, just letting his physical presence be there for Tim. He would let the younger boy make the first move…..and he did.  
“He’s gone,” Tim said shakily, trying not to cry. Tim’s mouth hung open at the shock, as if saying it made it more real. His lower jaw started to tremble, fighting a losing battle to keep his calm. Tim blinked rapidly, fighting whole-heartedly to keep the tears in.  
“He left earlier,” confirmed Dick.  
“Did he say anything?”  
“No, he didn’t even know I saw him leave.”  
“Maybe he’s just going to get a change of clothes and come back?”  
Dick squeezed Tim’s smaller shoulders in support, resting his head sideways atop the shorter boy’s head. Tim could feel Dick shake his head against his.  
“No, I’m sorry, he took his bike as well as some personal items that haven’t left this room since he died. He left.”  
“Is he coming back?”  
“I don’t know Tim.”  
“He got me a laptop.”  
“He did?” Dick straightened a bit, not knowing Jason had that in him to make things completely right.  
“Yah, it’s the brand new Previso, all the bells and whistles on it. It’s not even out yet; I have no idea how he got it.”  
Dick chuckled, “I’m not sure I want to know.” Dick decided to leave the laptop issue at that, hoping Jason got it through legitimate contacts. As the sons of Bruce Wayne they were all used to getting things before they were released - the latest video game consoles, the latest movies; some big wig trying to get in good with Bruce by getting his kids something cool. Then, of course, there were the times that Bruce used his own position to get those same hard to find, not- yet- released things as birthday or Christmas presents, or even for his multiple charities.  
“I was just coming to thank him but…he’s gone…..and it’s my fault.”  
Dick removed his arm from Tim to face him, totally confused why Tim would think that. Dick was ready to face the boy, prepared to set him straight, only for Tim to jerk out of Dick’s grasp and sprint to his room, the door slamming before Dick even knew what had happened. Dick shook himself out of it, determined to see this through with Tim.  
“Tim?” Dick called as he entered Tim’s room. Dick slowly looked around. It had been a while since Tim had allowed Dick to see his room and Dick marveled at how badly Tim had trashed it. This was no longer the Tim he knew. The obsessive compulsive cleanliness kid, determined to see his way through anything without anyone. When did his room get trashed? When did Tim start to cry? When had Tim gotten this bad? Why couldn’t he have seen it? Dick’s eyes finally settled on Tim who sat on the window seat enclave staring out the window. He heard sniffles and noticed Tim was trying to control his crying, but couldn’t.  
“Tim, why would you think Jason leaving is your fault?” Dick made his way to Tim and sat opposite on the same seat facing Tim. “Why Tim?”  
“I pissed him off; pissed him off so badly that he did what he did, and felt guilty enough about it to leave. If I hadn’t-“  
“No. No Tim. Look at me.” Tim kept his gaze out the window. Dick clasped Tim hands in his. “Tim, look at me,” Dick said more forcefully. Tim finally looked at Dick.  
“Look, Tim, Jason had a lot more issues going on, that was evident from what happened in the alleyway that night. Jason needs to figure out some things. Bruce dying brings up a lot of old wounds from his past that he needs to figure out, ok? This isn’t you, this is him.”  
“How do you know?”  
“I just…..do,” Dick said unwilling to divulge Jason’s secrets or what he did to find out those secrets.  
“Sounds like what Jason told me yesterday: ‘It’s not you, kid, it’s me, I’m just an asshole,” Tim mimicked Jason’s voice, bringing a smile to Dick’s face. “I tried telling him he wasn’t an asshole. Guess I wasn’t convincing enough. I failed.”  
“Hey, stop,” Dick said grabbing Tim’s chin and turning his face back to him when Tim tried to look out the window again. “You didn’t fail. I think maybe Jason heard what you had to say and it gave him more to think about. And that’s a good thing. And, if I know Jason, he won’t be gone forever, he always comes back…..literally,” Dick chuckled. Finally Tim’s laughter followed, knowing what Dick meant. Not even death could keep Jason Todd from this family.  
“Lunch will be ready soon, and Tim, I need you to be at that table, please?”  
Tim paused as if to ponder the question then nodded. “Ok. I’ll be there.”  
Dick smiled and leaned forward and hugged Tim. Dick stayed like that until he finally felt Tim’s small arms embrace him back. Dick pulled back with a smile on his face, happy to see a smile returned on Tim’s face. It may not have been a one hundred percent genuine smile, but Dick would take the fifty percent genuine smile for now. It was better than nothing.  
“I mean it Tim: if you’re not there I’ll come up here and carry you down.”  
“Jason tried that once when he first got here. The threat worked.” Tim chuckled at the memory.  
Dick clasped his hands on either side on Tim’s smiling face, wanting to keep that face there forever. “Everything will turn out, ok? We’re getting there, you’ll see.” Dick stood and made his way to the door. “See you at lunch in about ten minutes,” Dick threw over his shoulder as he exited the room, closing the door behind him.  
The talk with Dick left Tim feeling uplifted, like maybe everything would be ok. Tim reached into his pocket and pulled out a flashdrive. He was preparing this news for Jason. He wasn’t sure how Dick or Damian would take it, but Dick seemed to have a lot of confidence in him just now. He could do this. He could tell Dick what he knew.  
About an hour later the boys were finishing their lunch. The meal was mostly filled with Dick telling them about the goings on at Wayne Enterprises and that it was getting harder keeping “Bruce” away and that they may need to think of something soon. Tim started fingering the flashdrive in his pocket, wondering if this was the right time to bring it up. Dick spoke first though.  
“I’ve come to a decision, and, I’m going to take up Bruce’s mantle. I’m going to be Batman.”  
Damian kept eating as if nothing had been said; clearly Damian knew this already. This troubled Tim. Why wouldn’t Dick tell him first? Or at least at the same time as Damian? Alfred merely smiled and patted Dick on the back giving him his approval.  
“When?” Tim asked.  
“Either tonight or tomorrow night, depending on when I can finish tailoring the suit to fit me.”  
“I can help you with that Master Richard.”  
“Thanks, Alfred,” Dick replied smiling back at the older man.  
“Actually…..Dick…..there may not be a need for that,” Tim said uneasily.  
“Hmmm? Why’s that?” Dick asked, slightly chuckling, scooping more food onto his plate.  
“Because, Bruce is alive,” Tim said quickly.  
That got a reaction: it was as if time stopped. Alfred stopped mid-stride away from the table, Damian froze, his fork mid-way between his plate and his open mouth. Dick froze as well, staring at Tim until his eyes slowly lowered.  
“Look Tim-“  
“I know it sounds crazy-“  
“It is crazy,” Damian spoke up.  
“Damian! Look Tim, I know we all want Bruce to be alive but-“  
“But he is-“  
“Tim, you’ve lost so much it’s easy to want to hold on to that hope-“  
“But if you listen I have-“  
“Tim, it might be good if you talked to someone. We know someone who-“  
“Look, there are things I know that-“  
“Tim! We saw the body! Clark even said-“  
“But Dick, listen! I have worked and have pro-“  
“Tim! Enough! I know it’s hard to accept, but Bruce is gone! Don’t disillusion yourself with this, it’s only going to prolong your pain.”  
“Excuse me!” Tim stood and left the table, going to his room. His meal was left mostly untouched.  
Tim spent the next two hours in his room, still fingering the flashdrive in his pocket. He thought to himself as he paced the room. ‘Is Dick right? Am I just disillusioning myself into a false hope that he is still out there? Could I be crazy? No! No! No! I’ve worked too hard on this! I have to make Dick hear me. I can’t give up on this. Bruce wouldn’t give up on me.’  
Tim went downstairs to find Alfred tidying up the room. The old man never once said a thing to Tim about his…..revelation.  
“Alfred, have you seen Dick and Damian?”  
“I believe, Master Timothy, that they are in the cave training.”  
“Again?” Tim asked angrily as he headed through the clock entrance. Tim had noticed how much training time Dick was spending with Damian and not with him and he didn’t like it at all.  
Around five minutes later the clock entrance opened with a bang, the chimes of the old clock clanging together as Tim ran through and straight upstairs, slamming his bedroom door.  
“My word, Master Timothy, are you alright?” Alfred called after him with no response.  
Dick came running through right after, heading up the stairs as well.  
“Master Richard, is Master Timothy alright?” The butler called but again didn’t receive an answer.  
Dick reached Tim’s bedroom door, banging on it instantly. “Tim! Tim! Come on let’s talk about this! Please! Come to the door! Tim!” Dick tried the door, surprised to find it unlocked. Tim never left his bedroom door unlocked. He slowly opened the door with caution, worried about what he might find on the other end.  
But as Dick opened the door he found the room empty. Tim’s bedroom window was open and his backpack that he kept on the shelf was gone.  
Tim was gone.  
“Oh Shit!” Dick exclaimed, running to the window. Tim, however, was nowhere in sight.


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tim and Jason reunite

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always a shout-out to the best beta out there Alex Skywalker! She honestly really is great. Well I told you Jason wouldn’t be gone for long so he is back…sort….he’s just not back with the family. Quick note for later in the chapter lidocaine is the medication used to numb an area that is receiving stitches. I went back and forth on what to include and not to include in the chapter basically the ending, where do I end it or what to I just save for the next chapter. I do love keeping you guys on pins and needles on a cliff with my cliffhangers! So without further babbling I bring you…….. (Please give me comments!)

A Light in the Dark

Chapter 11

Jason had kept himself busy; besides tracking down human traffickers, he also kept himself busy trying to forget what he had left behind, and what he had done.   
It was just before midnight and Jason had cut his patrol short as he was done beating up those who he needed beating up and thus delivering them to the police station (surprisingly not killing one of them) and was also slightly injured himself (well, he told himself he was only slightly injured). But, it wasn’t something a couple of his favorite chilidogs couldn’t cure.  
Jason sat straight up in a high bar stool next to his kitchen bar counter. His back hurt too much to lean back into the hard stool backing. His favorite food was about to touch his lips when a very soft knock at his door crept to his ears. The knock was so soft and unsure that he at first thought he was overhearing a knock at his neighbors door. But, it came again and he rose stiffly, going to the door, un-holstering one of his guns and looking through the peephole. What he saw confirmed it. Though his head was bowed, Jason saw the familiar backpack and knew it was Tim. He remembered he’d brought Tim here when he grabbed a change of clothes, explaining the younger boy’s knowledge of the place. So the only question remained, why was he here?  
It had only been four days since Jason had left and he would be lying to say he wasn’t surprised to see the younger boy on his doorstep, especially after what he had done. The soft, unsure knock came again, pulling Jason from his thoughts. He watched as Tim turned to walk away and Jason saw that parts of his clothes were ripped. Jason opened the door, the gun still in his hand, but the arm hung at his side, the gun pointed downwards. Tim froze, his back to Jason, as he heard the door open.  
“Tim?” Jason asked, confused. Tim slowly turned to Jason and Jason saw a small bruise and cut by Tim’s hairline opposite the side he had previously hit him on. This wasn’t Jason’s doing. There was also more dirt on Tim than one would expect from a kid that lived in a mansion.  
“Hey Jason,” Tim said shakily. Concerned what was going on and figuring he at least owed Tim, Jason opened the door wider and signaled for Tim to come inside. As Tim shuffled through the door slowly he eyed the gun in Jason’s hand. Well, this wasn’t the best part of the neighborhood and Jason eyed Tim with both suspicion and confusion.  
“You look like you need to sit down so…..sit,” Jason said signaling to the couch. “You also, once again, look like you need to eat.” Jason brought a second chilidog out of the bag on the counter and tossed it to Tim who caught it effortlessly. He then took two sodas out of the fridge and grabbed his own chilidog and joined Tim on the couch, sitting next to him and handing him one of the sodas.  
“You ok?” asked Jason, pointing to the small, fresh cut on the side of his face.  
“Compared to the other guy? Yes. This little thing here was just the guy letting his presence be known.”  
“Well, between that and the backpack you’ve obviously ran away for a reason, which I will be hearing about later, but no one tried…anything? I mean….you’re….good and all?”  
“No one did anything, don’t worry. I only had enough money for three nights in a hotel so I had to spend last night on the streets and some guy tried to rob me is all.”  
“You should have come here first.”  
“I wanted to be alone to think, plus I wasn’t even sure you’d see me. I thought I was the reason you left.”  
“You weren’t, so you can just stop that line of thought…..wait. Dick doesn’t know where you are?”  
“No. They didn’t even know I was leaving and I never told them where you live after you took me here so don’t worry-“  
“But, I mean ….wait…..when did you leave the mansion?”  
“The day after you left.”  
“Cell phone?”  
“Oh please, you know I had to toss it; Dick can track me with that thing.”  
“And Dick doesn’t know you’re at least safe? Oh shit! He’s probably having baby bats!” Jason stood, yanking his cell phone out. Tim shot to his feet, grabbing at Jason’s cell phone.  
“NO! Jason please don’t! He doesn’t care, he doesn’t even listen to me! He doesn’t want me there, just please don’t!!!”  
Jason switched the cell phone to his opposite hand and held it up away from Tim’s reach, putting his other hand out against Tim’s chest keeping him at bay. Jason was shocked at what would make Tim say those things about Dick.  
“Tim! Tim! Calm down, I’m just letting him know you’re safe, that’s it. That’s all. Shhh…..don’t worry. You can stay here until it’s all good, just…..calm down. Now look, I don’t know what’s happened between you two, but Dick’s been through a lot too and he can’t be wondering if you are alive or dead out there on the streets.” Jason lowered his hand and helped Tim , who was shaking, sit on the couch.  
Tim sat down defeated and put his face in his hands. Jason saw Tim trembling and knew that he was scared. Something bad had happened indeed, but he couldn’t keep the news that Tim was safe away from Dick. He dialed Dick’s number and waited for him to pick up.  
“Dick?”  
“Jason! Thank God, I need your help!” Dick sounded exhausted, frightened, and exasperated all at once.  
“He’s here Dick. He just got here no more than two minutes ago but he’s with me and he’s safe, ok?”  
“Thank God, can you please bring him back-“  
“No, I don’t think he wants to go back and I’m not sure why yet.”  
Dick let a long sigh out, “Well, can you tell me where you are at and I’ll talk to him; he’s tossed his cell and I can’t talk to him-“  
“Dick, look, I don’t know what happened but he’s here with me and he’s…..scared….but he’s safe and here and …..that’s how it’s gonna stay for right now, ok? Goodbye.” Jason hung up on Dick’s protests coming through the speaker of the phone.  
Tim slid his hands down his face having finished his outburst at hearing that Jason wanted him to stay here with him.  
“Just…..I think you should stay here until you work things out or whatever; it’s safer than the streets after all, ok? Agreed?” Jason asked and Tim simply nodded, dumbfounded. “Good, now eat that chilidog before I do,” Jason said sitting down next to Tim. “Then I’m going to take a look at that cut.”  
“It’s fine, don’t worry about it.”  
“I’m sorry, are you going to argue with me in my own place?” Jason sarcastically asked.  
“Sorry, forgot who I was talking to,” Tim kidded back.  
“Damn straight.”  
__________________________________________________________________  
“SHIT!” Dick exclaimed after Jason hung up on him and threw his phone onto the computer desk in the bat-cave. Dick then sank into the giant computer chair. He was greatly relieved that Tim was ok after days of searching for him. They’d tried tracking him via his cell but Tim was smart and ditched his cell, giving it to a homeless man actually. Dick knew Tim didn’t have access to much money; with ‘Bruce’ still being alive the older man still had access to all that money, not Tim. Though Dick had access to the money too; Bruce had made sure of that in case anything ever happened to him. Plus, with Lucius Fox knowing…well…everything….He also took care of the boys financially. Dick didn’t know where Tim would have gone without money as he wasn’t with the Titans, hadn’t even contacted them and, as far as Dick knew, he didn’t know where Jason was or lived.  
He feared Tim might have gone off halfcocked somewhere and gotten into trouble after the second day. By the fourth day Dick feared Tim might have done something stupid and hurt himself. Dick was starting to have nightmares and thoughts that Tim was either dead or not coming home on purpose. Both notions broke Dick’s heart beyond repair. So to hear that Tim was both alive and safe, let alone currently with someone he knew and relatively trusted, brought great joy and relief to his aching heart and mind. But with joy and relief came frustration that Tim didn’t want to come home or even talk to him and that Jason wouldn’t let him talk to Tim.  
“I trust that Master Timothy is safe?” Alfred inquired from behind Dick.  
“Yes, he is at Jason’s place. Jason said he just got there minutes ago but he obviously knows something is wrong as he said Tim doesn’t want to come home or even talk to me and he isn’t going to make him.”  
“At least he is found and safe.”  
“If you can call being with Todd safe.” Damian chimed in from doing his pull-ups on a high bar.  
“Damian! You know what, go run the gauntlet again! Dick shouted and the younger boy groaned and mumbled something walking away.  
“What was that?”  
“Yes sir! Mr. Batman sir!” Damian said with a mock salute.   
Dick leaned forward and put his head in his hands. Alfred stepped forward and put a supportive hand on Dick’s shoulder.  
“Never fear Master Richard, he will return to us, he just needs time. Perhaps talking with Master Jason might help.”  
“What have I done, Alfred? I drove him away. What am I doing? I can’t do this. I can’t be Batman.”  
“Master Richard, if you think being Batman means you have all the answers I am afraid you are mistaken. There have been many nights Master Bruce has sat in that very chair and asked me the same questions you are now. They were usually asked when one of his Robins was in peril. It appears to me, sir, that you are right on track.” Alfred squeezed Dick’s shoulder and smiled. Dick tried to return the smile and patted Alfred’s hand and sat back in the chair.  
_______________________________________________________________________  
Tim hissed as an alcohol laden Q-tip pressed against the cut by his hairline on the right side of his head.  
“Oh, don’t be such a baby, you aren’t going to need stitches.” Jason finished his ministrations by putting a butterfly band-aid over the cut. “OK, that should do it, you need to go get clean and then we’ll talk.”  
“What about you? I noticed you’re moving a little stiff.”   
Jason hesitated in his cleaning of the first aid supplies.   
“You’ve got a whole in the back of your beloved jacket.” Tim threaded his finger through the hole and felt a warm, sticky substance. He pulled his finger back to no surprise revealing blood. “Jason, you’re bleeding!” Tim shouted.  
“I got another hole in the jacket, son of a bitch,” Jason said ignoring Tim’s cries about him bleeding.  
“Jason, take off your jacket,” Tm ordered, already attempting to yank it off of the older man.  
“It’s no biggie kid, I’m more pissed about the jacket.”  
“I can’t see the whole thing, Jason, this is deep, I can’t see how deep so take off your shirt.”  
Jason did as Tim asked, knowing how sore and stiff he felt. He heard Tim gasp behind him. Tim stood and went into the kitchen grabbing a few towels.  
“That’s bad Jason, it needs stitches, not to mention it looks like a jackhammer got to your back with all the bruises. What did you do anyways?” Tim held a towel with one hand to Jason’s wound while the other hand rummaged around in the first aid kit picking out the supplies needed for stitches.  
“Oh ya know, same ole, same ole. Ya know what you’re doing there?”  
“Of course; you know he made us learn first aid and how to patch ourselves up. Too many trips to the hospital and people start asking questions. You’re gonna have to lay face down in order for me to get at this. Oh and lidocaine? You got any? It’s gonna hurt like a bitch otherwise.”  
Jason chuckled at Tim’s unusual cursing. “Uuhhhh, locked medicine cabinet under the bathroom sink, key is taped under the drawer.” Tim raced to the bathroom, grabbed the key and unlocked the cabinet. He easily found the lidocaine and a syringe. Also inside the cabinet Tim noticed were some painkillers and various antidotes: ones for Joker venom, Scarecrow toxins and poisons, as well as some from Poison Ivy. Also in the cabinet, Tim wasn’t shocked to see stocked ammo and clips. Not wanting to let Jason get suspicious he locked the cabinet back up and replaced the key. When Tim came back in the room Jason was already laid out, face down on the couch. Tim could tell Jason was trying to not nod off as his night’s activities were clearly taking a toll on him. Tim sat on the edge of the couch preparing the syringe of lidocaine.  
“You know the first injection of this is going to hurt, so please…..don’t hit me.” Tim said, ridding the syringe of any air bubbles.  
“I’ll do my best, no guarantees,” Jason kidded. Tim plunged the needle into the wound and Jason hissed as he buried his face in the crossed arms that his head rested on.  
“Sorry, sorry. Now I get to show you my sewing skills.” Tim picked up the materials for the stitches and got started. “You’re lucky this isn’t worse, they could have very well gotten your lung if they put more pressure behind this. I grabbed you some ibuprofen for pain; do you want something stronger?”  
“Nah, don’t like how it makes my head feel funky. I need to be alert.”   
Tim groaned in his head. He kind of hoped Jason would opt for something stronger and pass out before he would have to tell him what happened. “Fair enough, but I imagine you have some antibiotics somewhere around here and you will need to take them.”  
“Yes mom. I don’t suppose your magnificent sewing skills can fix my jacket? I hate it when that happens.”  
Tim chuckled playing along. “Sorry son, you and your friends are just going to have to play nice.”  
Jason returned the chuckle and turned his head to try to look at Tim. “Speaking of playing nice, what happened between you and Dick? Ow! Jesus!” Jason exclaimed at a particularly hard tug of the thread. He wondered if Tim did that on purpose for asking.  
“Sorry, it’s a long story.”  
“We seem to have time.”  
“I’m almost done. Dick doesn’t want me anymore. He doesn’t listen to me, he dismisses me and just uses the excuse of my recent losses as that I don’t know anything. He also seems to think talking to a therapist solves everything.”  
“Yah, Dick does that; it’s easier for him because it’s what’s right in front of his face. It’s also his strange way of showing he cares.”  
“Please don’t side with him. That’s that last stitch, I’m done,” Tim said clipping the thread and scooting back to allow Jason to sit up.  
“I’m not siding with him, hell hasn’t frozen over yet. I’m just…..trying to explain to you how Dick thinks, sometimes, and how sometimes he just doesn’t think,” Jason said as he sat up grabbing his shirt and pulling it on. As he did this Tim stared at Jason’s chest noticing something: a thin scar that ran down the center of his chest. It was barely noticeable as it was older, healed, and thin. The scar was merely lightened colored skin in a line that one would only notice it if they were in the close physical proximity that Tim was to Jason. Tim realized that he was staring and put his gaze back on the table, only to find his eyes sliding to the left back at Jason who was now staring back at Tim.  
“Tim? What’s up?”  
“Did you…..have heart surgery?”  
“What?”  
“It’s funny it’s just that sometimes I think I know you and can trust you but that there are times that I realize I don’t know you.”  
“I’m not following.”  
“The scar,” Tim pointed to Jason’s chest.  
“Oh…..that.” Jason let out a long sigh and sat back into the couch cushions. Tim did the same hoping he hadn’t asked a wrong question, but they both settled in ready to talk. “I had a crushed sternum. The Joker beat it pretty badly with the crowbar, then the force of the explosion did the rest of the job. After my…..resurrection I was brought to a hospital where they apparently treated my wounds. The crushed sternum was just one of a few surgeries I had had. Internal bleeding, skull fractures, bleeding in the brain, but the dip in the lazurus pit took care of a lot of the surgical scars or at least made them a bit less noticeable. I don’t remember it all, I only have fragments of memories from that…..so…..uh……yeah.”  
“Oh,” Tim said suddenly uncomfortable that he inadvertently brought up a sore subject for Jason.  
“So what’s that all about? Knowing me and trusting me yet not knowing me, blah, blah, blah.” Tim held in a chuckle as the ‘blah, blah, blah’ was Jason code for ‘family, mushy, feely, shit’  
“I thought I knew Dick and could trust him with information, with listening to me, taking me seriously, but he just…..didn’t. And now he doesn’t want me anymore.”  
“I kind of doubt that, Tim, you didn’t hear how he freaked out when he was on the phone. Why do you think he doesn’t want you? What information are you talking about?”  
Tim just shook his head, suddenly unsure if he wanted to tell Jason or not; he didn’t want the same thing that happened with Dick to happen with Jason.  
“I don’t know where to start.” Tim blinked rapidly, willing himself not to cry.  
“Try the beginning,” Jason said scooting a little closer to Tim and putting a hand on his shoulder in support seeing that Tim was struggling and trying not to cry.  
“Bruce…….is alive.” Tim didn’t take his eyes off of the floor, not wanting to see Jason’s reaction.  
“That’s the beginning?” Jason asked shocked.  
Tim couldn’t tell if Jason’s reaction was more shock or disbelief. Either way Tim was scared. He stood suddenly, running his hands through his hair and started pacing, preparing himself for Jason to tell him the same thing that Dick did.  
“Go ahead, I’m crazy, I don’t know what I’m talking about, I just want to hold on to someone, go ahead. You know this was a mistake.” Tim reached for his backpack. Jason then stood, grabbing Tim’s wrist to stop him.   
“Tim, wait, calm down, you are getting ahead of yourself here.”  
Tim tried turning the other direction but Jason grabbed Tim from around the shoulders and turned him to face him. His hands then went to the sides of the boy’s face making sure Tim didn’t turn away.  
“Calm down, you’re not going anywhere. Just breathe. Sit down and just tell me what you know.”  
Jason’s hands went back to Tim’s shoulders where he led him back to the couch and sat him down, keeping one hand on a shoulder both in support and making sure he didn’t try to take off again.  
“You believe me? That……Bruce is…..alive? You’ll listen to me?”  
Jason wondered what Dick did precisely to have Tim lose this much faith in Dick…..in himself.  
“Tim, I would be kind of a hypocrite if I didn’t at least listen, I mean, hell, look at what happened to me.”  
Jason had a point, one Tim didn’t even think about. Jason knew this was possible. Tim nodded, ready to begin.


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A shout-out to my wonderful beta AlexSkywalker!!! This chapter is a little bit shorter but answers some questions as to what’s on the flash drive (this sounds stupid but is flash drive one word or two because it’s coming up as a spelling error when used as one word but it’s possible the computer just doesn’t know what a flash drive is) and why Tim ran out of the cave upset and ultimately running away from home. Tim and Jason brotherly fluff but then as it usually happens something pisses Jason off. One step forward twenty steps back but I suppose that’s the way it has to be in order to keep the story going.  
> REVIEWS!!!!!!!! Please? They help me know what I am doing well or doing wrong. Reviews Please?

Tim sat comfortably on the couch and told Jason everything he knew; from Bruce’s “death” to his rebirth, the clues about him lost in time and how he had to get him back. He showed Jason everything he had worked on that was saved on the flash drive. As he neared his conclusion he started to sit closer and closer to the edge of the couch. Jason sat next to Tim quietly listening through the young boy’s speech without interrupting. He noticed Tim inching his smaller body closer to the edge, clearly starting to get nervous.  
When Tim finished he let out a big sigh and clasped his hands on his lap. He tipped his head towards Jason with a quirked eyebrow, nervous to see how Jason was going to take this.  
“Well?” Tim asked nervously.  
“Wow,” the older man said simply as if someone had just told him old, obvious news, not that yhis adoptive father wasn’t dead and was actually alive. Jason still stared at the screen of the new laptop and all the information piled on it throughout the various windows that were open on it. He stood suddenly and walked to the fridge.  
“Please tell me you believe me,” Tim whimpered.  
“Relax kid, like I said I would be a hypocrite if I didn’t. You’ve obviously done your research, and it looks like you’ve got all your evidence together that makes this legit but there are still some what if’s and questions which could cause some people to be skeptical about it.” Jason reached into the fridge and pulled out a beer for himself and a soda for Tim.  
“Yah and there’s only one way to answer those questions.”  
“We go out and find out for ourselves.”  
“I got out and find out for myself.”  
“Hey kid, that’s just-“  
“I’m the one that did the research and collected the evidence and know this forwards and backwards, I know some of this is based on faith, my faith, that he’s out there, so I have to be the one to do this. If I’m wrong then I need to be the one to deal with that…..on my own.”  
Jason sighed and nodded; he could understand and respect where Tim was coming from. As Jason handed the soda to Tim he remembered the reason Tim was using the new laptop he’d given him and what Tim must have been working on when he destroyed his old one.  
“When I…..uh…..broke your other laptop did I hurt your…..investigation?”  
“Nah, I mostly had everything saved on the flash drive.”  
“So Dick didn’t listen to you? Even with all this evidence? What did he have to say to that?”  
“He didn’t even give me the chance. The moment I mentioned that Bruce is alive he suggested therapy, that I wasn’t handling the loss well. He just didn’t give me a chance. And don’t even get me started on Damian.” Tim’s eyes fell to the floor and Jason could tell there was more to the story.  
“OK, so, that explains the ‘Dick doesn’t listen to me’, but what’s with the ‘Dick doesn’t want me anymore’?” Jason kept his eyes on Tim as he sat next to him on the couch, opening his beer.  
Tim looked like he was struggling to keep his emotions in check, something that was becoming increasingly difficult for him. Tim went from the boy who never cried to one that couldn’t help himself. Obviously something had happened and it had hurt Tim enough that the mere mention of it sent him spiraling.  
“He doesn’t. Dick decided to take up the mantle. Dick is Batman now.” Tim took a deep breath and moved his eyes back up to Jason.  
Jason sat back still watching Tim. “Yah, it was only a matter of time before that happened. Are you worried that he won’t want you as his Robin because he didn’t listen to you about Bruce possibly being alive? Dude, don’t’ worry. You are a great Robin, maybe the best and that’s coming from me, the person who you replaced so…..take that with respect.” Jason took a swig of his beer, his eyes never leaving Tim as his head tipped back. Tim had let his eyes drop back to the floor, a single tear rolling out and falling to the floor. “Tim?”  
“Dick doesn’t want me as Robin.”  
“Tim, dude, don’t worry he’s gonna-“  
“No Jason, I know he doesn’t want me.”  
Jason was confused and shifted his body on the couch so that that whole front of him was facing Tim.  
“Dick said that?”  
“He didn’t have to.”  
“What happened, Tim?”  
“Can I have one of those first?” Tim pointed to Jason’s beer. Jason leaned his face in close to Tim and playfully glared upwards at him as if to say ‘Really? You think I’m going to let you get away with that?’ Tim let out a big sigh and began.  
“Well, after Dick ignored me at lunch about my theory I went to my room to think for a while.”  
“To brood,” Jason chuckled.  
“Fine, to brood. I was debating what to do next. I knew Bruce wouldn’t give up on me so I couldn’t give up on him. So I went back downstairs with the intention of showing Dick and making him listen. That’s when it all went wrong.” Tim began to tell Jason the story of what caused him to leave the manor that night.  
FLASHBACK  
“Alfred, have you seen Dick?”  
“I believe Master Richard is in the cave training with Master Damian and asked not to be disturbed.”  
“Again?” I raced down to the cave through the clock and was met with a sight I did not expect. Well, looking back I should have seen it. The amount of time Dick was spending training Damian. How Damian seemed to know everything about what Dick was doing before I did.  
As I descended the stairs into the darkness I first heard laughter. Both Damian’s and Dick’s.  
“Looks good on you, Damian, I don’t even think we will have to tailor it,” Dick said.  
As I came to the last stair I looked up. I saw Damian wearing a Robin costume, my Robin costume, one of my first ones, when I first became Robin and I was about as small as Damian.  
“What the hell is going on?” I asked. Dick and Damian looked up, startled; obviously I wasn’t expected.  
“Tim!” Dick stood up suddenly. Dick was wearing his new bat-suit with the cowl pulled down.  
“Well, this is one way we could tell him,” Damian piped up.  
“Damian, just go get changed alright,” Dick ordered. He then turned to me with ‘I’m sorry’ written all over his face.  
“What the hell is going on Dick?”  
“I wanted to talk to you about this Tim but…..there just never seemed to be a good time; and then what you spring on us at lunch? How was I supposed to tell you then?”  
“So you think I’ve lost it? I’m crazy? I let all the losses in my life get to me? Did you ever think this is another loss?! This was all I had left!”  
“No Tim, that’s not it, not at all!” Dick moved forward and put his hands on my arms to calm me but I shook him off and took a step back. “Tim, I just think you are hurting, not crazy. I can’t teach you anything. I see you as my equal. You need to find your own identity, you’ve outgrown Robin! Damian, he needs this, you know if left to his own devices he will kill…..again! Is that what you want?” I remembered back to when Damian killed, thinking he was protecting Bruce’s empire, his kingdom, and all the times he must have killed for his mother and the shadows. But it didn’t matter to me. Robin was mine, let Damian find his own identity.  
“Tim, I made this choice because I know you can do this. Damian, he needs someone.”  
“That’s my own goddamn costume! Dick, how could you!? How could you not only take this away from me but not even tell me!?” I tried to hold back my tears through the anger. Damian’s figured appeared in my peripheral vision. He was still wearing the costume.  
“Have you accepted it yet?” Damian asked.  
“I see he listens to you really well.” I countered.  
“Damian, knock it off! Tim, he’s gone; you need to accept it and move on. This includes the role of Robin. We are all moving on. I’m moving on to Batman, Damian is moving on to Robin, you can move on to your own new identity.”  
“Yah Drake, maybe you can move on to Batgirl.”  
That did it. I was no longer in control of my actions. I turned around swinging, knocking my fist into Damian’s jaw. I think I felt a tooth or two loosen under my knuckles.  
“My name is Tim Wayne!” I cried and I didn’t want Damian to forget that.  
“Tim! Calm down! Stop!” Dick grabbed me from behind as Damian went down. I shook him off and he ran to Damian, to his new Robin. While he was distracted with him I ran out of the cave, to my room. I grabbed my emergency backpack, my new laptop and I was out the window before Dick even got to my bedroom door.  
END FLASHBACK  
Tim watched Jason pace back and forth in front of him. In the middle of Tim’s story Jason had gotten upset and started frantically pacing, running his hands furiously through his hair.  
“What he did wasn’t right Tim. I know…..I know how it feels to be…..replaced.”  
“By me. How I replaced you. But Jason, this is different.”  
“How so?”  
“Well, Jason, you were dead. I’m still alive. I got replaced right in front of my face, well, technically behind my back, but I was still there. You were gone Jason.”  
“That’s not what it was about, Tim. After me he never should have gotten another Robin. He never should have put someone else in danger. I guess he wasn’t that broken up over me being gone.”  
Tim new he accidentally struck a nerve with Jason, whether it was his story about what happened with Dick or telling him that him being replaced was different. Either way he needed to proceed with caution.  
“Jason, it wasn’t easy! You think it was easy for him to take me on as Robin? It wasn’t! But, him taking me on as Robin wasn’t about you Jason. You weren’t a factor in that.”  
“Well I should have been!” Jason roared turning on Tim. The smaller boy backed up a couple of steps, scared of Jason’s reaction. “Go take a shower, Tim.”  
“Jason, look-“  
“Go take a shower, Tim!”   
Tim did as Jason asked because Jason was allowing him to stay and Jason no doubt needed some time alone to calm down. Tim took his shower, allowing the warm water to wash away the events of the past week. Jason’s apartment was small and simple; a living room that extended into the kitchen, a small balcony through a sliding glass door off the living room. Jason’s bedroom, the only bedroom, was through a door that connected to the living room. The only bathroom in the place was through a door in Jason’s bedroom.  
When Tim came back out into the living room in his sweats there were sheets, blankets and a pillow on the couch for him. He could see Jason outside on the balcony smoking a cigarette. Tim suddenly felt like he shouldn’t be here. Jason came back in through the sliding glass door.  
“Jason, look I’m sorry, I can ask Alfred for some money and stay at a hotel.”  
“No. I said you’re staying here until things get worked out and you will. Good night, Tim.” And without another word Jason disappeared behind the closed door of his bedroom. As Tim began to make the couch up he heard the shower starting up for Jason and went to bed. The sound of running water lulled Tim to sleep.

Jason rolled over and glared at the clock, 3:21 am staring back at him. He wondered what woke him up when he heard the noise again. Moaning, whimpering. Tim. Jason threw open his bedroom door, walking right into his couch that was flush up against the wall. Tim’s head was further away from him, his feet closer. The boy was tossing and turning obviously in the throes of a nightmare.   
Damn Dick. Damn Dick for doing this to the kid, and in turn doing this to him. Jason was tired and just didn’t want to deal with this. He didn’t have the patience tonight. He was hurting too, physically and emotionally. He nudged the couch hard and called out to the boy trapped in his terror.  
“Tim! Tim! Wake up!”  
“Huh?” Tim dazedly looked up at Jason and through the low light in the room Jason could see that Tim had been sweating profusely.  
“What? What’s going on?” Tim asked.  
“You were having a nightmare. Go back to sleep.” And Jason disappeared behind the closed door again. Jason went back to sleep only to be awoken by the same sounds half an hour later. Tim was hurting that much was evident. As Jason now lay awake in his bed he wondered and remembered back to when he found out Tim was the new Robin. He remembered how betrayed he’d felt. The hurt. The pain. Everything Tim was no doubt feeling now. He then wondered how he was going to get Tim, and himself, through this.


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay in updating, its the end of the semester and my school district is still in session and the kids are going crazy because they want out just as bad as the teacher does. (I keep telling myself one more day, turn in grades, and the chaos is over!)  
> Huge shout-out to my wonderful beta AlexSkywalker!   
> When I posted this before (on a different website) some people had mixed feelings over what Dick did or were actually surprised by it. I am going by canon here as in Red Robin #1 Tim goes down to the Batcave to find Damian dressed in the Robin outfit and I even borrowed one or two lines from the comic, and it causes Tim to leave to go find Bruce on his own in the comic (but in my story he’s taking a detour lol).  
> Just so it’s totally clear, anything in this story, (the entire story, all chapters) between Tim and Jason is pure brotherly fluff NOT SLASH. There is no slash at all in this story (sorry slash lovers, lol)  
> Please leave some comment and reviews!!! Kudos are nice and all but I want to know what you are thinking or feeling while reading this. Thanks!!!

A Light in the Dark

Chapter 13

Jason woke up about 6:30 in the morning and slowly trudged out to the kitchen. He had been up most of the night getting out of bed, walking out to the living room and waking up Tim only for him to get back to sleep and do it all over again an hour later. As Jason completed his journey to the kitchen he was met with the sight of Tim sitting at the kitchen counter trying not to fall asleep in his cereal. Tim’s hair was messed up and he had bags under his eyes. He obviously hadn’t gotten much more sleep than Jason did. They grunted their good mornings to each other, both far too tired and pissed to exchange pleasantries.  
As Jason drank milk straight from the carton, Tim got up, grabbed a glass and slammed it down in front of Jason who glanced at it and continued drinking from the carton. The silence left things tense and Tim didn’t like it.  
“You look like you didn’t get much sleep,” Tim drawled in his sleepiness. Jason looked at Tim flabbergasted.  
“Really,” he sarcastically replied.  
“Sorry,” Tim mumbled, going back to his soggy cereal. Jason felt bad just looking at the shape Tim was in.  
“It’s alright, you couldn’t help it,” he grumbled and Tim didn’t respond, probably out of embarrassment.  
As Jason made himself some toast he noticed Tim staring off into space.  
“What are you thinking about?” Jason asked.  
Tim snapped back to the land of the living and just shook his head in response.  
“I’m sorry, was that an answer? What. Are. You. Thinking. About? What’s bothering you?” Jason sat next to Tim and tapped his arm.  
“I need to get clothes and things from home but I’m trying to figure out how to do that without running into you-know-who-and-you-know-who-else.”  
Jason thought for a second and decided to make it easy on Tim. “I could take care of that for you.”  
Tim instantly felt bad. “No, it’s ok, you’ve already done a lot for me.”  
Jason grabbed a notepad and pen and set it in front of Tim. “Write a list of what you need and where I can find it. I’ll take care of it. Then try to get some more sleep, you look like shit.” Jason disappeared into his room to, no doubt shower, shit, and shave as he called it. Still Tim worried.  
“You aren’t going to kill Dick are you?” Tim called.  
“I might,” Jason called back as he shut the door to his room.  
A couple of hours later Jason was ready and he poked his head out to see Tim asleep on the couch. He went back into his room and got out his cell phone, calling the manor, hoping the right person picked up. Luckily he did.  
“Wayne Residence,” the crisp English accent of the butler sounded.  
“Hey Al, it’s me.”  
“Master Jason, so good to hear from you.”  
“Is Dick around the house right now?”  
“Afraid not, sir, he went to Wayne Enterprises to take care of a few things.”  
“OK good, that’s good. What about Short Shit?”  
“If you are referring to Master Damian he went with to stay out of trouble as it was told to me. The young Master lately has been quite…um…”  
“Yah, it’s ok, I get it.”  
“Good, sir.”  
“Look Al, I gotta come over and pick up some stuff for Tim; can you please just not tell Dick I’m coming?”  
“Very good, sir.”  
“Thanks Al.” And Jason disconnected the call.  
As Jason went back out into the kitchen he was grateful Tim was still asleep. Not wanting to wake him he grabbed Tim’s list off the counter and left him a note that he had gone to the manor and would be back soon.  
When Jason arrived at the manor, Alfred was there with a plate of his favorite cookies and a glass of milk.  
“Damn Al, you know me too well,” Jason said, as he took a quick seat to stuff the cookies in his mouth.  
“I took the liberty of grabbing a bag for you to use for Master Timothy’s belongings. How is the young sir?”  
Jason held up his finger indicating he needed a minute as he washed the cookies down with milk. As Jason was about to speak Alfred handed him a napkin and indicated that he had a milk mustache. Jason smile and wiped his face. Damn Alfred always had a way, no matter what was going on, to make this place feel like home and that he was still a kid here.  
“He’s not good. Dick really hurt him; besides not listening to him, he took away the one thing Tim had left.”  
“Hmmm,” Alfred hummed. Usually when Alfred did that either he didn’t want to get involved or he agreed with you but didn’t want it to be known, lest it hurt another one of his ‘boys’ feelings.  
Alfred went over to the other end of the kitchen and set a Tupperware container full of cookies in front of Jason.  
“For you both. I know cookies don’t solve everything but-“  
“But, it damn well helps,” Jason smiled looking at the container hungrily. “Thanks Al, I’ll try to save some for Tim, no promises though.” Jason paused to flash a smile at Alfred which was returned. “I assume Dick and Damian are still gone?”  
“Yes, however, they did not give me a return time. Do you need any help?”  
“Nah, kid gave me a list with where to find everything but I’d better get started. Thanks Al!” As Jason grabbed the duffle bag Alfred got out and the younger man bounded up the stairs.  
About thirty minutes later Jason was finishing up the list with his back turned to the doorway. He didn’t hear the new arrival.  
“How’s Tim?”  
Jason whirled around at the voice. Leaning on the doorway was Dick Grayson. His suit jacket gone, his tie loosened, and the top few shirt buttons unbuttoned. Despite his relaxed demeanor in the doorway Dick looked like he hadn’t been sleeping…..Good.  
“Oh, he’s just great, just perfect,” Jason started sarcastically. “You really did a number on him. Great job, Dick. You know I can’t even get him to sleep for more than an hour!”  
“I’m sorry.”  
“I’m not the one you should be saying that to.”  
“Well, if someone would let me talk to him!”  
“HE doesn’t want to talk to YOU! Get that through your head. Quite frankly, I don’t blame him!”  
Dick didn’t have a response to that. After Jason put the last thing in the bag he advanced on Dick, but stopped short right in front of him. Jason couldn’t stand the way Dick looked right now: relaxed, leaning on the doorway, and smug as shit.  
“Ya know I could just…..AAAHHH!” And Jason punched the doorway right next to Dick’s head.   
Dick didn’t flinch, didn’t even blink. Dick wouldn’t have blamed Jason if he sucker-punched him in the face.  
Debating on whether or not he should take his leave, but seeing as Dick was blocking the doorway Jason sat down on Tim’s bed. “You didn’t even listen to him, plus you took away the one thing he had left. What the hell were you thinking?”  
“I didn’t mean to hurt him, but we are all moving on to other things; a fresh start will do Tim good. Look, I know you have issues with replacing people but that’s not what this is about.”  
“Do you know how full of shit you sound? Do you? Doesn’t Tim get to decide if a fresh start will do him good? Could you have at least told the kid first? He had to walk in on Short Shit wearing his costume, HIS costume of all things, and I heard that Short Shit was very fucking helpful in the situation.”  
“He knocked out two of Damian’s teeth.”  
“Good. From what I hear, he deserved it.”  
“All the more reason for Damian to be Robin right now; he needs structure, discipline-“ Dick stopped as he noticed Jason had his hand up, opening and closing it in a puppet-like fashion. Dick pinched the bridge of his nose and took a deep sigh before continuing. “I was going to tell him, but he sprung this Bruce is alive stuff, so I didn’t know how he was going to react.”  
“Ah, yes, and you just shot him down didn’t you. Started making him feel like he was crazy.”  
“No Jason, I di-“  
“Started blaming all of the losses in his life, that this was just one thing he couldn’t accept.”  
“Jason, what proof does he have other-“  
“He has tons of it! An entire flash drive full!”  
“He didn’t tell me!” Dick straightened in the doorway.  
“You didn’t give him the chance to, did you?! Told him ‘enough, that’s it, finite, thanks for playing’. You didn’t listen to him. You tell him that you view him as your equal but then you shut him down first chance you get. You should really start practicing what you preach there, Dickie bird.  
“Think of how it sounds Jason. Bruce is dead and-“  
“And what, you don’t think people can come back from the dead?” Jason stood and took a couple of steps towards Dick. “Do you know how much evidence he has, how much he has been working on this? This is possible, Dick.”  
Dick still stood there with a blank look on his face. This frustrated Jason further.  
“He’s got a lot to go on, Dick, and he is going to go out there and look for the answers he needs and-“  
“He can’t do that, it’s too dangerous.”  
“Well it’s not as if he didn’t invite you to come along, Dick. Maybe this is what he is going to move onto, finding Bruce - and no, I’m not going to stop him, because if he’s our equal then he will be just fine. The least you could have done was listen to the kid.” Jason went back to the bed to pick up Tim’s now full duffle bag.  
“Fine, can you send me over the files he has on the flash drive?” Dick asked in a secret hope that it would make Tim think twice about going out there alone.  
“I don’t know. Are you up to something? I’ll think about it, but the kid usually has a death grip on the thing. But you have to admit it, Dick, you screwed up and screwed up big. Because he’s not sleeping, he’s having nightmares, moping around, scared as crap about ever coming back here or talking to you again.”   
Dick looked like he was about to cry. “I never meant to hurt Tim.”  
“Well, the kid just looks like he’s given up hope because he has to chock up two more losses in his life, the last two things he had: being Robin, and you, because he can never trust you again…….brother.” Jason emphasized as he walked out of the room and shoulder checked Dick on the way out.  
This angered Dick and as Jason walked down the hall Dick called out to him.  
“Why Jason?” Jason stopped but didn’t turn to face Dick. “Why do you suddenly care?”  
‘Is Dick purposefully trying to piss me off?’ Jason thought as he slowly turned to glare at Dick. He wasn’t going to give the older man the satisfaction of losing it in front of him.  
“I’m sorry, do you mean before or after everything I did for him here?”  
“I mean after you sucker-punched him and kicked him in the back.”  
Jason took a deep breath and looked at the ground before looking back up at Dick. Oh yes, Dick was definitely pushing his buttons, anything to take the blame off himself. Jason dropped the bag to the ground and took five long but quick strides up to Dick which caused the older man to straighten up and step out of the door, putting his arms up in case Jason decided to make a move.  
Jason got as close to Dick’s face as he could.   
“I care because I’m the one he ran to. I am the one he is staying with and I am the one who has to look at the kid’s defeated face like he has no purpose because YOU took it away from him!”  
Jason then turned on his heel, grabbed the duffel bag and headed downstairs where he grabbed the cookies.  
“Thanks Al,” Jason said as he headed to the door.   
Damian sat on the couch and acknowledged Jason. “Well Todd, it seems-“  
“Damian, I swear to God, if you utter one more word you will be talking out of your asshole for the next week.” And he slammed the door behind him before Damian could respond.

On the drive home Jason was fuming at Dick’s audacity at trying to turn things onto him, after everything he’d done to try and help, instead of Dick just taking responsibility for what he’d done. Besides fuming, Jason also knew he was tired from getting no sleep the night before and had every intention of taking a nap when he got home. The kid had better not bug him.  
Jason walked up the outside stairs to his apartment with caution as he always did. He did this not only because it was one of the worse areas of town, (though not the worst by far), but also because you never knew when someone might have discovered his little secret. The kid staying with him just added to the pressure.  
The first thing Jason noticed was that it was quiet. The apartment next door to Jason, the only other apartment upstairs for that unit building was empty, so Jason expected to hear Tim about the place- the TV on or music playing or something- but there was just nothing.  
Jason shifted the bag onto his other shoulder via the strap on it and fished for his keys with his left hand while feeling for the gun in the back of his waistband with the other. Jason slowly put the key into the lock and pressed his ear to the door. At first he was met with the familiar silence, then he heard it. Whimpering, someone calling or something. “No! Stop! Please! Wait, wait!” The calling turned to shouting then sounded somewhat muffled like someone was trying to shut the voice up. Jason knew that voice shouting, then muffled. It was Tim’s. Tim was in trouble? Wasn’t he? Jason didn’t hear another voice inside or any movement either.  
Jason burst through the door and luckily was met with the sight of Tim asleep on the couch, but in the middle of another nightmare. He had turned somewhat and the pillow was partly muffling his cries and whimpering. Jason plopped the bag down on the ground and called out to the young boy.  
“Tim, I’m home! Wakey, wakey!” Nothing. Jason kicked the end of the couch a few times as he so often did at night when having to wake Tim. Jason then went into the kitchen.  
“Tim! Come on man! Time to wake up, let’s go!” Jason noticed that his note he had left Tim on the counter had moved from where he originally had left it and that there was an empty glass of what looked like milk on the counter. So Tim had been up at some point. A giant yawn followed by a stretch escaped the larger man’s body and reminded him of how tired he was, but he knew he wouldn’t get any sleep with Tim crying out like this.  
“Tim! Tim! Come on man, I’m tired! Wake up!” Jason grabbed a beer from the fridge, opened it, and downed about half of it in one go. Jason hoped a beer would calm his nerves enough to help him deal with Tim and then get some sleep.  
As Tim rolled back over onto his back Jason was able to get a better view of him. Tim was pale and sweating pretty bad. His dark hair was plastered to his forehead and sweat spots had formed down the front of his t-shirt. Yet despite the sweating, Tim appeared to be trembling as if he was cold….. or was it fear? The boy also appeared to be reaching out for something.  
Tim continued to cry out “No! Wait! I’m sorry! Don’t hurt him! Don’t! Con! Conner! Wait! Help!”   
Ah, so this one was about Conner. Jason tilted his head back and finished his beer, setting the bottled on the counter as he slowly approached the tortured boy.  
“Help! I’m sorry! Con! Please! Come back!”   
Jason’s heart clenched at that. Tim had lost a great many people, all within the last two months. Jason cautiously kneeled by Tim’s head. He didn’t want to frighten him and get hit. “Tim! Tim, wake up Tim, it’s Jason!”  
Tim had turned on his side, facing Jason at the sound of his name and the hands that were reaching out found Jason’s jacket and proceeded to clench at it, thus having a death grip on it. Tim’s eyes fluttered wildly underneath the eyelids but did not open.  
Tim was just whimpering now. Jason tried leaning back a bit to see if Tim would let go of his jacket, but the boy didn’t. Jason then slowly started to take off his jacket to get out the grip, but upon getting out of the last sleeve he realized that Tim’s right hand actually had a grip on his shirt, not his jacket. Jason then decided to sweet talk his way out of this.   
He was reaching up and smoothing Tim’s hair back out of his eyes and off his forehead when Jason realized something. Since Tim had grabbed onto him for dear life the crying out had stopped and there were only a few sporadic whimpers. Well, this made up Jason’s mind for him. He didn’t care how this looked; he was tired, damn it, and needed to get some sleep.   
Jason kicked off his shoes. Luckily, Jason had a deep couch so he shifted Tim back a little bit which earned him the boy’s left hand coming up and gripping his shirt along with a whimper.  
“It’s alright, Tim, go back to sleep,” And Jason lay down next to Tim. Tim’s smaller hands were buried in Jason’s shirt and in order for Jason to fit on the couch and be comfortable to sleep he had to put his right arm around Tim’s head and shoulders as Tim lay on his side facing the older man. The larger man’s arm was essentially acting as a pillow for the smaller one’s sweat-soaked head. Yeah, this definitely looked bad, but oh well; Jason was tired and Tim was finally quiet and somewhat at peace with Jason next to him. If only that peace would last, but Jason knew that it wouldn’t.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Now that you've read the chapter what do you think? Anything I can improve on? Anything that you specifically liked?  
> Thanks!!!!!!


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the long delay. I have no excuse I sometimes forget I am still posting this here. It's already all written and posted in other fanfic communities. As part of my apology I will post two chapters right now. Here is the first one for today. Thanks for your support and while I love kudos are great I also love comments to let me know exactly what you liked or didn't like. Thanks!

A Light in the Dark

Chapter 14

The late afternoon/early evening sun peeked through the vertical blinds of the sliding glass door in the living room. As Tim slowly came to awareness, even before opening his eyes, he noticed his hands felt like they were cramping. His head didn’t feel like it was resting on a soft pillow. As Tim slowly opened his eyes he was met with a sight he didn’t expect nor remember how he got to. Tim lay on his side facing his older brother Jason. The younger one’s head was resting on the sculpted bicep muscle of the older man with his arm wrapped around Tim’s shoulders and the hand finding a final resting place on Tim’s shoulder. Tim’s hands still gripping Jason’s now wrinkled shirt. Jason’s other arm rested across his own face.  
Tim slowly relaxed his hands and removed them from Jason’s shirt. Tim looked to his right to see how tightly the arm was around his shoulders and he noticed Jason’s hand. Jason’s knuckles on his right hand were bruised and slightly swollen. Tim pondered if Jason did kill Dick. The notion caused him to sit up slightly. As Tim looked back at Jason he was met with an open green eye peering back at him through the arm that still rested across his face.  
“Uh…..Jason?.....uh…..” Tim struggled to start.  
“Don’t get your panties in a bunch, you had a nightmare when I came home and wouldn’t let go of me so in order for either of us to get sleep this is what it ended up being, that’s all. I don’t care how it looks, I was too fucking tired,” Jason said as he sat up, thus causing the smaller boy to sit up as well. Tim instantly felt bad. Jason got up and went into the kitchen.  
“I’m sorry,” Tim said as he looked at the ground.  
“Don’t,” Jason simply replied. Tim continued to look at the older man with confusion. “Don’t apologize,” Jason added. Tim opened his mouth to ask why, but shut it again, deciding against it. Tim came to the conclusion that Jason himself had had his fair share of nightmares too, remembering back to the manor, hearing Jason in the halls, and his reaction of sucker-punching him in the face. Tim then noticed the full blue duffel bag by the door.  
“Thanks,” Tim said motioning to the bag. Jason tossed a Tupperware container to Tim.  
“Compliments of Alfred.”  
“Wow, cool, I’m surprised there’s any left,” Tim smiled digging into the contents.  
“Yah, well, Alfred may have stuffed a dozen or so cookies in me while I was there.”  
“Um…..speaking of which…..while you were there…..uh”  
“Just spit it out Tim.”  
“Did you kill Dick?”  
“What?”  
“I noticed your knuckles on your hand were bruised and a little swollen.”  
“Oh, actually I killed the doorframe; I was hoping Dick would flinch and I would catch his head but no such luck.”  
“So you and Dick did have it out?”  
“Yah, but don’t worry about that right now.”  
Tim continued to stare at Jason blankly.  
“Tim? Don’t worry, you don’t have to go back there right now.”  
Without saying anything, Tim got up and went into the kitchen, Jason watching him with confusion. Tim got a dish towel and put some ice cubes in it and handed it to Jason, looking pointedly at his bruised hand. Tim then began to busy himself going through the kitchen cupboards, periodically reminding Jason to keep the ice on his hand.  
“Tim, what are you doing?”  
“Looking for something to make your dinner with.”  
“Me?” Jason questioned, thinking the word ‘us’ should have been used but decided against harassing Tim. He didn’t like the way Tim was lately. Sullen, withdrawn, depressed. “Tim, you don’t have to do that.”  
“I want to; it’s the least I can do for letting me stay here.” Tim tried to smile at Jason but it didn’t reach his eyes. Tim seemed to know this as he looked at the floor. “Besides, it’s not like I have anything else to do.”  
Jason knew what Tim meant. He didn’t have patrol, didn’t have Robin, didn’t have Dick or the family he’d grown to love as his own. Tim needed a reason. He needed to move on, not because Dick said he had to, but because Dick forced him to. If Tim didn’t snap out of this soon Jason was going to have to help him find something to move on to. So Jason made an attempt.  
“After dinner, you want to go on patrol?”  
“As who?” Tim snorted almost in laughter at Jason’s idea.  
“I don’t know, you did have me pack a couple of your Robin outfits and I’m sure Short Shit hasn’t been out as Robin yet-“  
“But I’m not Robin anymore. I guess I just had you pack those for sentimental reasons or to make sure Dick didn’t give those to Damian too.”  
“You have a mask, you can still come along; I promise no killing, Hood’s honor. Come on, what do you say?”  
“No thanks, you can go if you want. I’ll keep an eye on things here for you, and be ready to stitch your ass up when you need it,” Tim said trying to sound playful and went back to making dinner which looked like Tim had decided would be spaghetti.   
Jason decided not to go out. He wanted to keep an eye on Tim…..just in case.  
A couple of weeks went by and Tim hadn’t changed. He still moped around the apartment, insisting on caring for Jason in exchange for him letting him stay, but Tim wasn’t caring for himself. He rarely ate and Jason knew he wasn’t sleeping because of the endless nightmares during the night; countless times each night Jason had to listen to his whimpers and cries until it got to the point where Jason had to get up and walk to the living room and wake Tim up. Lately, Tim was getting harder to wake up and it scared Jason. Tim’s constant nightmares also meant Jason wasn’t getting much sleep which made him irritable, tired, and cranky. Tim spent most of his time awake, moping or working on looking for Bruce. Each night Jason offered Tim to patrol with him and each night Tim declined. It was starting to wear on Jason.  
Things started coming to a head a couple days later. Tim had taken to taking naps during the day due to the nightmares taking way from the amount of sleep at night. Jason wasn’t much different; between patrol and Tim’s nightmares, he wasn’t getting much sleep either.   
Jason was sitting at the kitchen bar reading, starting to nod off when he heard the familiar sounds of Tim’s whimpers. Tim had been working on his laptop on the couch, no doubt still looking for more evidence that Bruce was alive, and apparently had also nodded off.  
“No, I’m sorry, Dick.”  
Ok so, this one was about Dick.  
“Tim! Wake up!” Nothing, which really didn’t surprise Jason as usually when Tim was so deep in his nightmare he was calling out he was difficult to wake.  
“Dick, I’m sorry, please, not Arkham.”  
Jason stopped mid-stride on his way to wake Tim at the mention of Arkham. This wasn’t the first time Tim had mentioned Arkham and Dick in the same statement. When Jason had suggested that Tim show Dick his files on his flash drive, Tim declined, saying it would just give Dick ammunition. When Jason asked ‘ammunition for what?’ Tim replied ammunition for Dick to send him to Arkham. Upon seeing Jason’s reaction to the word Arkham he’d immediately apologized knowing how Arkham affected the older man.  
Jason sat next to a pale and trembling Tim. The younger boy had lost as much color as he did weight, no doubt from lack of eating, lack of sleep, and lack of seeing daylight. Dark circles hadstarted to form under the boys eyes a few days ago.  
Jason continued to call his name and when that did no good he began to lightly tap or slap his face. Tim then woke suddenly and gripped Jason’s wrist to pull his hand away. However, Jason noticed how weak Tim’s grip was and easily pulled his wrist free.  
“Let me guess, nightmare?”  
“Would there be any other reason for me to be slapping you in the face?”  
“This is Jason Todd I’m talking to, right?” Tim sat up and scrubbed his face with his hands only to see Jason still staring at him in concern. “What? Something wrong?”  
“Hmmm? Nah, I’m, uh, just going to go have a cigarette.” Jason than began to walk out the front door.  
“Where are you going?”  
“Cigarette, I told you.”  
“Oh, you just usually have your cigarette out on the balcony.” Tim knew Jason was no chain smoker, he usually only smoked when stressed. He obviously wanted away from the young boy and Tim couldn’t figure out why.  
“Oh, well you mentioned we were out of milk so I was going to have my cigarette on the way to the corner market.”  
“OK, I’ll heat up leftovers for you while you’re gone.”  
“For us you mean,” Jason corrected as he closed the front door. As soon as the door closed, Tim’s eyes went to the kitchen counter where Jason’s cigarettes and lighter were left behind.  
As soon as Jason got far enough away from the apartment he took out his phone and stamped in Dick’s number.  
“Hello?”  
“Listen here shithead and listen good.”  
“Well, hello to you too Jason; how is Tim?”  
“Did you ever mention or threaten to take Tim to Arkham?”  
“What?”  
“Something wrong with your fucking hearing?”  
“Jason! No! I didn’t! I wouldn’t do that!”  
“Oh really? Need I remind you-“  
“Jason I didn’t! Not in this situation I swear! Now please! How is Tim?!” Dick’s voice cracked. His façade of keeping it together was no longer there. He missed Tim. This did not go unnoticed by Jason. Noticing Jason’s silence Dick continued. “Jason please, it’s been weeks, let me talk to him. Let me see him! He’s my brother!”  
“He doesn’t want to see you, or talk to you. And that has nothing to do with me, by the way.”  
“Will he let me see the files about Bruce?”  
“No. That’s when he mentioned Arkham; he feared you would use the files as ammunition to send him there.”  
“Why would he think that?”  
“Oh gee, I can think of a few reasons.” Jason’s mind flashed back to when he had been shot after he’d helped Dick, Tim, and Damian solve a case and Dick had left him for Gordon to pick up and on Bruce and Dick’s authority had him sent to Arkham. Jason had nearly wanted to kill himself in that place. But Jason viewed killing one’s self as a coward’s way out, and that’s what scared him: he actually considered taking his life and Jason was no coward.  
There was silence. The only thing that could be heard was Dick’s shuddered breathing. Was Dick crying?  
“Look, Dick, he’s not good, nightmares are getting worse. He’s not eating, just moping around the place and working on finding Bruce. Quite frankly, I’m worried about him. The kid needs something to grab onto to pull him forward and out of this- to move on- and unfortunately you didn’t give him much to do that with. It’s his choice, Dick, when he wants to talk to you he will, but I don’t see that happening anytime soon. So in the meantime, stay away from him. He needs to make the first move.” Jason then hung up before Dick could respond.  
Dick let the phone fall from his hands as he let the sob fall from his lips. He collapsed to his knees with his face in his hands. Alfred ran over to him, putting his supportive and loving hands on the younger man’s shoulders. “I’m so sorry Master Richard.”   
Alfred had watched Dick over the last few weeks run himself ragged trying to find his way as the new Batman, trying to find a way to talk to Tim, as well as train Damian and keep Bruce’s company running, knowing that the time would be soon that they would have to fake Bruce’s death.  
As Jason walked in the apartment with the milk he saw Tim standing at the kitchen counter. He looked tired and weak.  
“Enjoy your smoke?” Tim asked as he produced Jason’s cigarettes and lighter from behind his back.  
“Oh yah thought I forgot something.”  
“Jason,” Tim said sharply seeing right through Jason’s lie.  
“Just don’t, Tim.”  
Tim then stepped back further to reveal Jason’s plate of food for dinner. It was the only plate there.  
“Tim, where is your food?”  
“Not hungry,” Tim said as he looked away from Jason.  
“Look!” Jason slammed the milk on the counter and Tim backed up a couple steps. Tim knew a confrontation would come sooner or later but he wasn’t in the mood for this now as he wasn’t feeling well.  
“This has got to stop!”  
“Jason, please-“  
“All you do is mope around here.” Jason was in Tim’s face and the more Tim backed up the more Jason approached.  
“Jason, I need to find Bruce!”  
“Well, do it on a full stomach; this is ridiculous!”  
“No, it’s not.”  
“It’s like you don’t even know who you are anymore, Tim!.....Tim?” Jason stopped his yelling as Tim’s back hit the bedroom doorway and Tim grabbed onto it as he swayed, breathing hard.  
“Tim?” Jason asked as Tim’s eyes rolled back in his head and the younger boy fell forward into Jason’s arms, passed out cold.


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the second chapter I posted today so make sure you read chapter 14 too!  
> I love kudos and appreciate them but I also really need comments so I know exactly what you like or didn't like. Thanks!

A Light in the Dark

I realize this chapter took longer to write and I apologize but this was a detour I took that wasn’t planned in the overall storyline. But it was a necessary one. I think some of you know where I am going with this and I needed Tim to truly hit a rock bottom in order for him to rise again. I also knew exactly where I wanted to end this chapter in order to get back to my overall outline of the story thus the chapter ended up being longer than expected. I have knowledge in medical workings and practices as I used to be an EMT, however I am not a doctor and this is called fiction for a reason so suspend a little disbelief here, lol. Other than that enjoy and of course.

Chapter 15

The small, weak young boy fell forward into the strong arms of one Jason Todd, passed out cold.  
“Shit!” Jason exclaimed as he sprang into action. Jason had no doubt in his mind that Tim had passed out due to both not eating and not sleeping. Dehydration and exhaustion do not mix well, especially with one already weakened by stress.  
“Tim? Tim!” Jason called to him, tapping his cheeks, but not receiving an answer. “Come on, Tim, don’t do this.” Jason tried shaking the smaller boy- still no response. Jason saw that Tim was sweaty, pale and cold to the touch. Fearing the worst, he felt for a pulse, finding a weak, thready one and then he put his ear to the boy’s chest and a hand to his face and, thankfully, felt the young boy breathe lightly.  
Jason reached one arm around Tim’s back and the other under his legs and lifted him, noting how light he felt. Jason carried Tim over to the couch and laid him down on it, proceeding to call the younger boy’s name and tap his face. What alarmed Jason most, besides Tim not coming to, was that there was no reaction at all to the tapping, something that normally worked. There was not even the flutter of his eyes beneath his closed lids.  
Jason stood and paced by Tim’s makeshift bedside, biting his nails, trying to figure out what to do. He began talking out loud to himself.  
“Okay, Okay, he’s only been out for a couple of minutes; there’s no need for too much alarm yet.”  
And that’s how things remained for the next thirty minutes: Jason pacing, periodically calling Tim and tapping his face, only to get no response. Throughout the thirty minutes Jason ran through the different possibilities in his head. He could take Tim to a hospital, but that had disaster written all over it. Not only did Jason not trust doctors but the end result would be Tim returned to the manor and the doctors trying to get in touch with Bruce and that just wasn’t possible. Moreover, Jason could just picture all the newspaper headlines of ‘Bruce Wayne’s adopted son anorexic, trying to kill himself.’ and whatever other conclusions they decide to draw.  
He considered calling Dick or Alfred, but again the end result would be Tim returned to the manor, Tim mad at him, and Dick even more mad at him and no doubt blaming him for what happened. Then the kid would just run away again and probably not go to Jason the second time, considering his trust in the man violated. Then where would Tim end up? So Jason called the only other person that was a genius- and could handle this situation- that he could think of.  
“Hello?”  
“Harper, I need your help.”  
Roy Harper was part of the outlaws and had recently been fighting alongside Jason. He used to be friends with Dick, but over the years the two had grown apart. Roy was one of those secret geniuses, one that no one knew about because they chose to focus on his past addictions and flaws.  
“Jason! Ya know the problem with giving no one your phone number and blocking it when you do call is that we can’t reach you. When we came back from off world I heard about Bruce and couldn’t reach you, I even stopped by your apartment a couple of times and you weren’t there.”  
“I was at the manor.”  
“Wow, really? How did that go?”  
“Harper! Focus! Look, I really need your help ok?! I need you to come by my apartment now, right now!”  
“Ok, geesh, I’ll be there in ten minutes.”  
“You have five!” and Jason hung up the phone.  
In true Roy fashion, he showed up in the ten minutes he’d promised, not the five that Jason demanded, knocking furiously on Jason’s door once he arrived. Jason, taking no chances, opened the door an inch, holding it there with his foot and peering out the crack.  
“Where’s the fire?” Roy asked.  
“Let me ask you something first: are you and Dick still friends?”  
Roy got a strange look on his face. “I…I don’t know, we haven’t really talked in a long time; we’re just kind of…..doing our own thing I guess. Why?”  
“None of this leaves this apartment. You are to tell no one, ESPECIALLY Dick, or so help me-“  
“Ya ya you’ll kick my ass. Now what’s going on?”  
Jason opened the door further to reveal to Roy a weak looking Tim Drake laid out on the couch.  
“Is that Tim?” Roy walked past Jason, kneeling down beside the younger boy. “What’s going on?”  
“It’s kind of a long story, but he’s sick and due to Batman, and not Bruce, being dead, Tim not wanting to go back to the manor, and the possibility of newspapers getting a hold of something like this, I need YOU to make him better.”  
“Okay, so what happened to make him so sick?”  
“The short of it is that he’s been really stressed due to some stuff that happened at the manor and has been staying with me the last few weeks – yes Dick knows – and he hasn’t been eating despite me trying. He’s skinny as can be and, due to nightmares, he never sleeps and I mean never. We were getting in an argument about him needing to eat and he just passed out cold and that was about forty five minutes ago and I can’t get him to wake up. Please help me.”  
Jason said please; it had to be bad.  
“Where’s your medical stuff?”  
“You know where it is; have at it.”  
Roy disappeared into the bedroom as Jason sat on the arm of the couch closest to Tim’s head. Roy returned with an armful of medical equipment, and immediately started to examine Tim.  
“Well?” Jason asked impatiently.  
“Give me a few, Jason.”  
Roy took Tim’s vitals, looked at his eyes and lifted up Tim’s shirt, marveling at the weight the kid lost. Roy started pressing on Tim’s abdomen and then took off Tim’s shoes and socks and then used metal stick, running it up and down the arch of Tim’s foot, watching for a reaction of some sort. He seemed satisfied that he got it. He then tapped on Tim’s reflex joints and nerves, receiving a response there as well. Roy then looked at Jason.  
“You said never sleeping?”  
“Never.”  
“And never eating?”  
“You see how much weight he’s lost.”  
“And he’s been stressed?”  
“Severely.”  
“How long?”  
“Stressed, for months. No eating and no sleeping…..two weeks, maybe more.”  
“Jesus, Jason!”  
“What did you want me to do, Roy! If I sedate him he would have lost my trust and run off and then where would he be? I couldn’t hold him down and shove food down his throat!”  
“I’m going to need more medical equipment than you have.”  
“Like what?”  
“Like oxygen, IV materials and stand, heart and O2 monitor, and unless you want piss all over your couch and him, which could lead to infection, I’ll need catheter equipment too. And other stuff…..”  
Jason cringed at the word catheter; that was going to be embarrassing.  
“Jason, do you know some place we can get all that?”  
“Yah, the Bat-cave. Don’t worry, I’ll take care of it, just make me a list.”  
Roy made a list and showed it to Jason. The stressed out man asked a few questions regarding certain pieces he’d never heard of before and Roy drew pictures for Jason. Jason then made phone calls to what he liked to call his ‘lackeys’(his low level runners , his eyes and ears out on the streets); Batman and his new Robin were spotted out and about patrolling, meaning the Bat-cave was clear.  
“Roy, you’ll stay here and watch over him? You’re good?”  
“Of course, Jason.”  
“Okay, keys to your car; there’s no way this is all fitting on my bike.”  
Roy tossed Jason his keys and Jason made his exit with some empty duffle bags and one long parting look to Tim. Jason didn’t want to leave him, but he knew the younger boy was in good hands.  
Jason got to the Bat-cave, finding the pass-codes were the same as the last time he was there and also thankfully finding it empty. Jason went through the list as quick as he could, not only grabbing oxygen tanks, heart monitors, and O2 monitors, but all the wires and tubing that went with them. There was a multitude of other things Roy needed that were a bit difficult to find, but Jason knew they were there; the Bat-cave was stocked like a top notch hospital. Finally, Jason had what he needed and left.  
When he got back to the apartment, he found that Roy had stripped Tim of his clothing and covered him up with the comforter. It was a necessary evil in order for Roy to do everything he needed to do. Luckily the couch was already made up so Tim lay on the sheet.   
It took Jason almost five trips to get everything from the car to the apartment and even before he was done, Roy got to work on Tim. Jason spread out the materials on the floor and the coffee table, making it easier for Roy to find things, and began to ask questions.  
“With everything you are doing to him you obviously expect him to be out for a while. How long are we talking here?”  
“Not sure; it could be two days or it could be two weeks, it’s kind of all up to Tim.”  
Jason continued to unpack the supplies.  
“Is he like, in a coma?”  
“No, not at all. He’s breathing on his own; I’m not needing to pump oxygen into him. He is breathing a little shallow, but the oxygen will help with that.” Roy then affixed the oxygen nasal canals in Tim’s nose, wrapping it back and around his ears. “His heart is beating perfectly normal and his blood oxygen stats are good with oxygen which we will continue to monitor.” Roy then put stickers all over Tim’s chest with wires that led to a monitoring machine. Roy also wrapped a blood oxygen monitor around Tim’s index finger and a blood pressure cuff around his upper arm, all leading to monitoring devices that Jason plugged in. “And his brain function is great. It’s kind of like when a clock unwinds or something runs out of batteries. Tim’s body, between being stressed, not eating, and not sleeping, ran out of juice and just shut down so it can recharge its batteries, so to speak.” Roy now tied a tourniquet around Tim’s left arm and the man sat on the floor trying to find a vein to start an IV with. “Sometimes what happens after this is people’s organs start to shut down. But, that hasn’t happened here,” Roy added before Jason freaked. Roy tossed Jason another tourniquet. “Get his other arm and see if you can find a vein; he’s so dehydrated I’m having trouble.” Roy knew he also needed to give Jason something to do.  
Jason climbed across Tim, kneeling on his other side, thankful again that he had a deep couch, tied the tourniquet around Tim’s right arm, and began searching for a vein. “Ya know, Roy, I’m not very good at this.”  
“Don’t worry, I think I got something. Can you set up that IV pole with a saline fluid bag?” Roy stabbed at the vein on the inside of Tim’s forearm and luckily got a blood return. He grabbed tubes off of the table. “I want to get some blood drawn before I start his fluids. I have a friend at a lab who owes me some favors and will run some tests with a Jon Doe blood sample.”  
After the blood was drawn, Roy started Tim’s fluids and added a bag of vitamin and essential nutrients that also ran through the IV which ran through yet another machine.  
“Maybe we should have put him in the bed in the bedroom,” Jason said.  
“Nah, this is where he’s been sleeping and he’s here and hooked up to everything so he’s good,” Roy replied. Roy was genuinely shocked at how caring Jason was being to the younger boy who he’d never even called by his first name, only ever referring to him as ‘the replacement’ This was a side of Jason, Roy wasn’t sure he’d ever seen. Maybe it was the loss of Bruce, maybe it was whatever went down at the manor, but Roy liked seeing that Jason was opening up and letting people in. Roy continued.  
“You know, Jason,” Roy continued. “When Tim wakes up, he’s not going to be up and ready to kick ass.”  
“What do you mean?”  
“He’s going to be tired, he’s going to need to re-up his energy, and that’s going to take time.”  
“Okay, well, when he does wake up, he’s eating a whole pizza, fourteen chilidogs, and a two liter bottle of soda.”  
“And that’s a great way to make him throw it all up. He needs to start small: chicken broth, soup-light stuff - then work his way up.”  
“How long until he’s normal again.”  
“You guys are normal?” Roy joked. “Anything I say you bats are going to cut in half, so again, it’s kind of up to Tim. But, whatever you do, don’t rush him.” Roy reached for the catheter equipment and Jason visibly cringed. Having had surgery he knew what they were like and they were…..uncomfortable. Roy sensed Jason’s uneasiness.  
“You can turn around if you like.”   
And Jason turned his back to Roy inserting the catheter. As Jason’s back was turned he heard Roy’s cell phone go off. “Your phone?”  
“Don’t worry, I’m in the middle of something; let it go to voicemail.”  
A couple of minutes later Roy was happy that Tim was passing urine easily, saying that the kidneys were the first to go, but Tim‘s were doing their job just fine. Jason then heard Roy take off the rubber gloves and figured it was safe to turn around again. Roy then took out his cell phone to see who called.  
“Uh oh.”  
“What?”  
“It’s Dick who called.” Roy put the voicemail on speakerphone. Dick’s angry voice came through the speaker.  
“Roy, it’s Dick. I noticed an interesting thing on the Bat-cave cameras: your car and Jason getting out of it and stealing a hell of a lot of medical equipment. I want to know why because Jason looked to be just fine. You call me as soon as you get this, you hear me? As SOON as you get this!”  
Roy looked at Jason, obviously unhappy that he’d been dragged into this.  
“What do I do now?” Roy demanded.  
“Call Dick back and tell him I borrowed your car a couple of months ago and you haven’t even seen me to get it back yet.”  
“He’s supposed to believe I’m getting around without a car?”  
“Tell him you’re staying with Starfire if you like; that should shut him up,” Jason said, knowing it would be a low blow to Dick’s former relationship with the alien.  
Roy shook his head and headed to the balcony to make the call. A couple minutes later he returned.  
“Well, he’s not happy. He says if I hear from you to tell you to call him. He’s concerned something happened to Tim since you seemed fine on camera and he hasn’t seen or even talked to Tim in weeks. What’s that about?”  
“Tim doesn’t want to see or talk to him - I didn’t do that. I’ll call him later with an excuse, but it’s Dick’s fault he’s like this.”  
“What the hell happened, Jason?”  
Jason sighed deeply and ran his fingers through his hair. He sat on the floor, his back against the couch by Tim’s head, and motioned for Roy to sit down. Jason then told Roy everything that had happened, from him being called to the manor and hearing about Bruce’s death and finding Dick in bad shape, to his days in the manor, to his fight with Tim and his leaving (he left out Bruce’s goodbye message to him), to Tim coming to his place and Dick not listening to Tim’s theory on Bruce being alive and Dick taking Robin away from Tim. Roy just sat there and took it all in.  
“He thinks Bruce is alive? What do you think about that?”  
“Stranger things have happened,” Jason said pointing to himself.  
“Wow, he has been stressed,” was all Roy could say after that. Then after a moment: “But, he’s going to be fine, Jason, he still has a good brother looking after him.” Roy smiled. “Do you want me to stay? I can look after him. There are things that are going to need to be done, Jason. I’ll need to change his IV bags. He’ll need to be turned every so often and bathed every day to avoid bed sores. Let me help you out,” Roy pleaded. Jason nodded.  
“Ok, take the bedroom; I’ll stay out here.”  
Roy nodded, knowing he wouldn’t win with Jason on that one and headed into the bedroom.  
The next morning, Roy came out to find Jason where he had left him on the floor, his jacket wrapped around his front, leaning against the couch, his head tilted back so it was barely touching Tim’s head. Roy found it too irresistible and took out his phone to take a picture, but before he could get the shot he heard the rumble of Jason’s voice.  
“Take it and die.”  
Roy laughed. Jason stood up and got out his own phone. “I’m going to call Dick so be quiet.”  
The phone call with Dick didn’t go well. Jason agreed with Roy’s story about the car and told Dick the medical supplies were needed for one of his lackeys that had gotten hurt and he would return the medical supplies when he could and emphasized that he was borrowing them, not stealing them. He also said that Tim still didn’t want to talk to him. He even played it up, to Roy’s amusement, Jason calling Tim in the open air asking if Tim wanted to talk to Dick. He then made it a point to remind Dick that he was the reason Tim didn’t want to talk to or see him and he was the reason Tim ran away and that Jason was the one who he was staying with now and Jason was the one taking care of him now. And then Jason hung up the phone furiously. He was stressed and this was not going to be a pleasant few days.  
As the days went on, Jason insisted on helping Roy with everything concerned with Tim’s medical care. Jason learned how to change the catheter and IV bags. He turned Tim when it was time and helped Roy give Tim his sponge baths. Luckily Roy noticed that Jason decided not to take a page out of Tim’s book and was taking care of himself, eating, sleeping, and even working out. Though he always gave Roy the bedroom, Jason still slept, whether it was in the recliner or on the floor next to Tim. Roy periodically heard Jason having a nightmare in the night. The man liked to act like he didn’t care, but it was obvious he did. Jason stopped going on patrol. Roy offered to sit with Tim and look after him if he wanted to go, but Jason always declined.  
After a week went by, though, the time had taken its toll on Jason.  
He was pacing in the living room, furiously running his hands through his hair. There had been no change in Tim’s condition. The blood samples came back telling them what they already knew: that he was malnourished. Roy stood in front of Jason to get him to stop pacing.  
“Jason you’ve got to calm down. Tim’s still doing okay.” Roy wasn’t used to seeing Jason like this either. No matter what, Jason was always cool, calm, and in control; even when they were getting their butts handed to them, Jason always took everything in stride.  
“Roy, I should have taken him to a hospital.”  
“He’s doing okay, it’s just a waiting game; the hospital will tell you that too.”  
“What am I supposed to do here, Roy? The kid trusts me. I don’t know why- I’m a big fuck- up -but he trusts me to do the right thing.”  
Roy put his hands on Jason’s shoulders. “Jason, you are not a fuck- up. It’s your decision what to do, but I do want you to remember the reasons you told me that you didn’t want him to go to a hospital.”  
The two men then heard a groan and Jason saw movement out of his peripheral vision. He turned to see Tim turning from his side to his back.  
“Tim?” Jason called as the two rushed to Tim’s side. Jason sat on the couch next to Tim and looked into Tim’s open blue eyes. Tim was awake.


	16. Chapter 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tim may be awake but he has a long way to go. It may appear that we are getting closer to the end but there is still a lot more story to be told.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I got a couple comment the last two chapters which is great and I appreciate you both, but I would love to see more. What do you like about the chapter/story? What do you not like about the chapter/story? Are there any mistakes I need to fix? You guys know what to put in a review/comment. I have been writing for my new love of anime particularly Yuri on Ice but I wasn't getting any reviews/comments at all. So, while I am still writing the story for me, I haven't posted anymore on it. I see writer's post a new Yuri on Ice story with similar tags as to mine and they get like 50 comments on the first chapter. What am I doing wrong that I'm not getting reviews/comments?I don't ask for them for attention or anything, I ask for them so I legitimately know what is going on in my reader's thoughts when they read my story. Kudos are nice and all but reviews/comments are more precise and let's me get to know you.  
> So please that's why I ask for them, please don't let me down.  
> Thanks!

A Light in the Dark  
Chapter 16  
Jason rushed to the side of the groaning Tim. The man was overjoyed to see two blue eyes open when he got there. Tim was looking everywhere, confused. It was evident the younger boy wasn’t quite with it yet.  
“Tim? Tim?” Jason called out his name repeatedly, concerned that Tim’s eyes weren’t looking at him. He felt hands on his shoulders pulling him back.  
“Jason, give him some room man, just…..let me look at him ok? He’s not quite here yet. Ok? Jason?” Roy kept shifting his face in front of Jason’s who kept trying to look around Roy to see Tim. “Jason!”  
“Yes! Fine! Ok! Go, go look at him,” Jason said turning Roy around and shoving him towards the groaning youngster on the couch.  
Roy sat down on the edge of the couch next to Tim’s side. Tim groaned again; his eyes were still looking around but not as frantically.  
“Tim? It’s Roy Harper. You know me. It’s ok.” Roy put his hand on Tim’s chest, partly to show he wasn’t supposed to get up and partly as a comforting gesture. Tim’s next groan turned into a whimper. “Ya, I know you’re probably in some pain right now. I’ll help you with that in just a minute but I need you to do a couple things for me first, okay?” Roy grabbed the flashlight pen and got close to Tim’s eyes to check his pupils which, thankfully, responded normally. Tim, however, didn’t like it and whimpered again, trying to turn his head away. Roy lightly took hold of his chin to turn his head back to him.   
“I know, I know, buddy, I just need to see something.” Tim then tried batting away the offending light with weak arms flailing everywhere. He was like a newborn, not quite in control of his limbs yet. Tim whimpered again and shut his eyes against the pain of the light.  
“Tim, I just need you to follow the light for a few seconds then the light goes away, I promise. Now come on, look up.” Tim looked up but squinted, following the light with his eyes, yet moving his head slightly. After a few seconds Tim shut his eyes whimpering. Tim then started testing his muscles, shifting around a bit, groaning and whimpering.  
“What’s wrong?” Jason asked from his distance.  
“He’s a bit confused I think, not quite with it, and he’s in a bit of pain.”  
“Why’s he in pain?”  
“His muscles have atrophied, he probably has a headache from just having nutrients and his eyes aren’t used to the light yet.“ Roy went back to Tim as the younger boy started to pull on the wires, IV, and oxygen tubing from his nose. Tim was starting to breathe fast and heavy. “Don’t do that Tim, just calm down,” Roy held Tim’s hands down gently as it didn’t take much strength to do so.   
“Tim, calm down. I need you to slow down your breathing can you do that? Come on, the light is gone, open your eyes for me.”  
Tim opened his eyes slightly, still squinting from pain. Roy put his face in Tim’s field of vision.  
“Tim, listen to me, you’ve been sick, you’ve been asleep for a while. I know things are confusing, but you’re in safe hands, okay? Can you say something? Anything?”  
Tim looked around again as he croaked out a name. “Jason?”  
The name sounded rough and harsh against unused vocal chords, but it uplifted Jason’s spirits immediately. Roy turned around to see Jason already heading towards them and made room for him on the couch as he got Tim something for the pain. Jason sat down next to Tim, holding the boy’s hands in his own so Tim wouldn’t pull on anything. Tim was still being shifty and wiggly like he couldn’t get comfortable.  
“Hey there, I’m right here. What’s wrong man?” Jason asked, concern flowing through his voice as well as his eyes.  
“Hurts.” Tim croaked again and shifted his head up, stretching his neck.  
“Ya, I think Roy is getting you something for that. Uh…..here.” Jason looked around picking up a water bottle and shook it in the direction of Roy who was filling up a syringe. Roy nodded at Jason.  
“Not too much though, and not too fast.” Jason nodded at Roy’s instructions and gave Tim a couple of mouthfuls of water. Tim was trying to pull his hands away from Jason’s and was looking around at all the equipment.  
“Okay, Okay, but no pulling at anything, okay?” Jason said as he cautiously let go of Tim’s small, frail hands. Tim gently touched the oxygen tubing across his face then shifted his arm to look at the IV. Tim tried weakly to pull up the blankets, looking underneath at the catheter. “Uh, yah, that was kind of necessary, sorry. But don’t worry; like Roy said, you’ve been sick but you’re going to be ok now.” Jason was concerned at Tim’s lack of talking.  
Tim suddenly started to make a gagging noise. Roy put down the now full syringe and bottle, grabbing a trash can.  
“Turn him on his side!” Roy commanded and Jason did as told just in time for Tim to dry heave into the trash can. No substance, just dry heaving. Tim rolled onto his back when he was finished. Jason wiped his face with a towel.  
“It’s alright Tim, that’s normal, it’s okay,” Roy said handing Jason the water bottle. Jason gave Tim another drink of water and noticed tears coming from Tim’s eyes.  
“Tim? You okay?” Jason asked. Jason didn’t know if the tears were from pain or from the vomiting.  
“Ow.” Was all Tim could produce. Roy then put the medicine filled syringe into Tim’s IV.  
“Tim, this is something to help with the pain, but it’s going to make you a little sleepy. The most important thing is to rest right now, okay?” Roy said. Jason gave Roy a look as if he was insane and Roy just shook his head back at him.  
“We’re going to be right here Tim, okay? Just rest,” Jason said reassuringly and waited until Tim finally shut his eyes against the medicine and his breathing evened out. Jason then stood and pulled Roy aside.  
“Are you serious? You want him to sleep some more?! He’s been out a week!” Jason yelled at Roy, his hands on Roy’s arms, lightly shaking him as if to shake some sense into him.  
“Jason, this is good. He woke up, he’s followed some simple commands; that’s actually better than I expected for his first time waking up. I told you he wasn’t going to be just fine right away. Plus, he is in pain, I had to give him something for it. Would you rather he be awake and in pain?” Roy said, getting frustrated with Jason, yet understanding his position of concern. Jason let go of Roy’s arms. He let his hands fall to his sides and his head hung down.  
“No,” Jason whispered just loud enough for Roy to hear him.  
“Jason, he’s going to be fine. He won’t be asleep for another week, just another couple hours. Let the pain pass. He’s going to be tired for a while here. Next time he wakes up I want to see if he can handle something light, like soup and if he can keep that down than I can start removing some of these bags off of the IV.”  
Jason just nodded his head from its sunken position. Roy patted Jason’s arms.  
“Why don’t you go to the store and get some soup and broth and get some things Tim will like and enjoy while he is going to be down.”  
Jason left for the store and was surprised to see Tim awake when he got home. Tim looked to be deep in thought and obviously Jason had walked into a serious conversation. Jason was unloading groceries when Roy walked into the kitchen.  
“I’ll take care of this and make some soup. If he keeps this down I’ll take him off some of the nutrients through his IV, see if he can stand and then take the catheter out tomorrow.” Roy said, taking the groceries out of Jason’s hands. Jason glanced once more at Tim. Tim was staring at his hands in his lap. His head was downcast and he was obviously deep in thought.  
“What’s going on?” Jason whispered to Roy, tilting his head to Tim.  
“Why don’t you go talk to him. Think he needs it.”  
Jason walked cautiously over to Tim with a confused looks on his face. He sat down on the floor next to the couch Tim lay on.  
“How you feeling?”  
“Tired, weak.”  
“What’s going on? Something is going on in that big ass brain of yours, and obviously I walked in on something.”  
“I asked Roy why I was sick, how I got sick.”  
“And?”  
“And basically I did this to myself, my own actions made me sick.”  
“He said that-“ Jason started to stand up, only to be stopped by Tim’s hand, light on his arm.  
“Don’t. He didn’t put it in those words exactly, but it’s true. I wasn’t sleeping or eating and then…..this.”  
“Ya, I didn’t know why you were doing what you were doing or how to get you to stop and we got in an argument and you passed out. That was a week ago.”  
“Roy said I scared you.”  
“I thought you were dead.”  
“I’m sorry.”  
“I had to call Roy because I didn’t know what else to do without violating your trust and either me or someone else calling Dick, who knows I stole this medical equipment from the cave. But I lied and told him it was for someone else. But, uh, I think Dick might be starting to lose it over not having any contact with you for so long. But, that’s you decision.”  
“Now what happens?”  
“You get better. Talk to me. Tell me how I can help so you don’t end up like this again. Because this….. it just isn’t worth it. But you have a bit of a road ahead of you to get well according to Dr. Roy.”  
“When did you become such a sap?” Tim joked, trying to smile but it didn’t quite reach his eyes.  
“Let’s just say I understand what you are going through. Feeling betrayed, replaced, etcetera, etcetera, etcetera.”  
Tim nodded and was looking sleepy again.  
“Why don’t you rest while Roy and I make dinner and some soup for you. If you keep it down you can get rid of half this crap. I got you some books and stuff for while you’re down. Don’t worry, we’ll figure it out, okay.”  
Tim nodded and scooted down into the couch, getting more comfortable.  
“Thanks Jason, for everything,” Tim murmured as he dozed off.  
“Sure kid,” Jason whispered back, smoothing Tim’s hair back.  
The next morning brought successes and setbacks. Tim was keeping his light food of broth and ginger ale down so Roy took the nutrients off the IV stand but kept the fluids on as a precaution.  
Roy had wanted to try Tim standing but there lay a setback. Sitting all the way up left Tim weak and dizzy and shot up his blood pressure. Orthostatic Roy called it, and said it was probably normal but set some things he wanted to try back a few days. This frustrated Tim.  
Tim slept a lot. He slept through the nights, surprisingly not having any nightmares. Once is a while Jason thought he heard Tim moan or toss and turn, but whether that was out of pain and being uncomfortable or a nightmare, only Tim knew. Tim slept a lot during the day as well. When he wasn’t sleeping he read the books Jason brought him or watched TV. Jason strictly forbid him from working the case about Bruce being alive and Jason even put Tim’s laptop out of sight. Roy had also started physical therapy on Tim, which was what Jason was doing with him at the moment.   
Jason sat at the end of the couch. His palms were pushing against the bottom of Tim’s feet as Tim bent his knees towards his chest. Tim didn’t like physical therapy, though he knew it was necessary. Tim also constantly bitched about the catheter making him uncomfortable. The boy’s attitude lately had changed; he wasn’t miserable or depressed. He was frustrated and angry. Of course, no one knew who Tim was frustrated or angry at.  
“Are we done yet?” Tim growled.  
“Almost, five more,” Jason said, trying to ignore Tim’s tone.  
“Two more, you lost count.”  
“I did not, it’s five.”  
“I’m done.”  
Jason grabbed Tim’s ankles as he attempted to put his legs back under the comforter.  
“Five. Now.” Jason argued back.  
Tim let his legs go limp and turned his head away from Jason’s glare.  
“I don’t know what’s gotten into you, Tim, but getting angry at us isn’t going to help your situation. We are the ones trying to help you.”  
“I’m not angry at you,” Tim muttered.  
“What was that?” Jason asked.  
“Nothing,” Tim said as he turned on his side and closed his eyes. Jason let out a frustrated sigh and walked into the kitchen where he met Roy.  
“Another outburst?” Roy predicted.  
Jason nodded. “He’s pissed and frustrated and I don’t know why or what’s worse.”  
“Chill, he’s probably frustrated at his situation and angry at himself for putting himself there.”  
“Well, he better get over it.”  
“Did you?” Roy asked. Jason glared murder at Roy who put his hands up in mock surrender. “Look, tomorrow morning he will try standing and walking and the catheter comes out. Maybe that will make him happy.” Roy’s phone beeped and Roy rolled his eyes obviously frustrated.  
“Ignoring someone?”  
“Yah, Dick, he’s been blowing up my phone wanting to talk to you since he can’t find you patrolling. He is reaching out to me as friends again, probably because he has no one else. He doesn’t sound good, Jason. You want to hear these voicemails?”  
Jason just put up one hand silencing Roy and the other hand pinching the bridge of his nose feeling a headache coming on. It had been four days since Tim woke and Jason didn’t know if things were better or worse than before he fell into his light coma.  
The next morning Roy took out the catheter and Tim desperately wanted to go to the bathroom. They allowed Tim to slip on some loose shorts and had him sitting up. His blood pressure remained normal so they tried standing. Roy and Jason were on either side of Tim who insisted he didn’t need this much babying. With one of Jason’s hand holding Tim’s and the man’s other hand on his upper arm for support, Tim stood. He was shaky at first, but no nausea, dizziness, or blood pressure problems.  
“Let’s try walking to the front door, slowly,” Roy said as he felt Tim pull to walk forward.   
Tim took the shaky steps forward. His knees wobbled with each step he took and he leaned heavily on Jason and Roy, concerning Jason. It was obvious Tim could not walk on his own without the help and support of the two people at this side.  
“Okay, okay, not bad Tim, how do you feel? Dizziness? Feel too tired or weak?” Roy asked.  
“I’m fine; can we walk to the bathroom now?” Tim replied. It was obvious Tim was lying. Jason could hear his breathing labor and quicken just from walking the few steps to the doorway. Jason looked at Roy, a silent plea on his face to not let Tim do this. But Roy glared back at Jason as if to say ‘Let him learn on his own.’ Jason just wished Tim didn’t have to learn at his own expense. Lately Tim was being his own worst enemy, which wasn’t like him.  
It seemed like it took forever to get to the bathroom. They helped deposit Tim on the toilet.  
“We’ll be right outside, just call when you’re done.” Jason said.  
Tim nodded his head almost sarcastically and waved the two older men out of the bathroom.  
“Yah, Yah,” Tim muttered.  
“I mean it Tim, do NOT get up without us helping you,” Jason warned. Roy pulled Jason by the arm out of the doorway and closed the bathroom door. The two men walked to the bedroom doorway. Jason leaned against the doorway exhausted while Roy just stood there and stared at Jason almost smugly, arms crossed over his chest.  
“What?” Jason asked.  
“Just wondering how much longer you are going to fight Tim on this.”  
“Fight him? I’m trying to help him. I don’t know why he is acting like this!”  
“Would you be any different? Having to be babied, cared for, be weak in front of other people, needing to ask for help? It’s no more in your nature than it is his. He is frustrated.”  
“So tell me, Dr. Phil what do I do?”  
“Help him, don’t fight him on every little thing. There are some things Tim is either going to learn ‘I accept help or I fail’. He has to fight for himself, but right now he has no purpose to fight for. Think about it. All he has to fight to get better for is to live a life he doesn’t want to live right now. No Robin, no friends, no family, no mentor. Think about that. The only way you can help him is to give him a reason and a purpose to fight for. Show him there is a light at the end of the tunnel sort of speak,” Roy said.  
Jason just stared at Roy. He quirked one eyebrow at him with a quizzical look. Jason then chuckled under his breath.  
“What?” Roy asked. “It’s okay, you can say it, I’m smart.”  
“I wouldn’t have called you for help if you weren’t smart,” Jason replied. Roy smiled and ruffled Jason’s hair. Just as Jason was about to swat Roy’s hand away he heard the bathroom door open.  
“What the-“ Jason questioned. Jason turned to see Tim standing, barely, in the doorway of the bathroom gripping the doorframe. Tim was pale and shaking almost comically. With great effort, the boy raised his head to look at Jason. Tim’s eyes rolled back in his head which Jason took as his cue and dove, literally to his knees as Tim fell forward. Jason caught him as he barely hit the ground. Jason gently rolled Tim over onto his back on the ground as Roy joined them on Tim’s other side.  
Tim was passed out cold. Jason patted Tim’s cheeks lightly.  
“Tim? Tim! Open your eyes buddy,” Jason called as Roy checked his pulse.  
“Pulse is fast and thread.”  
“Why the hell didn’t he wait for us?” Jason asked.  
“I told you: he’s angry and trying to prove something.”

Meanwhile in Tim’s brain, he entered a dreamlike state. He wandered through a house resembling Wayne Manor dressed as Robin and as he entered each room, looking for someone, he only found death. In the first room he found Stephanie, one of his best friends, bloody and beaten in the middle of the otherwise empty room. He checked on her immediately, only for her to turn to dust and ash beneath his touch and the particles then blew away. The next two rooms went the same; Bart was in the next room, disappearing under his touch, and Connor in the next. After Connor disappeared, Tim began to sob.  
“Hello! Is anybody here?” Tim called.  
Tim went into the next room to find his father lying on his back and a boomerang sticking out of his chest. Tim ran to him, emotions mixed. He was happy to see him again, yet sad that it was in this state.  
“Dad? Dad?” Tim called to him. In his haste to help his father he pulled the boomerang out of the man’s chest and as he did, his father too turned to dust and blew away.  
“No! Dad!” Tim openly sobbed. Tim left the room and went upstairs. He stood at one end of a long hallway, suddenly feeling cold, and as he wrapped his arms around himself he found himself naked except for his underwear. As he turned around in confusion he saw Dick walking into the nearest room with his Robin costume in hand, Damian following him and the door closing behind them both.  
“Dick! Wait!” Tim called rushing to the door, pulling on it only to find it locked. Tim then heard his name being called. It was Jason’s voice.  
“Jason? Where are you?” Jason’s voice grew softer and softer, farther away like it was going down the hallway. Tim looked at the end of the hallway to see Bruce standing there looking at Tim.  
“Bruce!” Tim called and he started running down the hallway after Bruce. As Tim ran the hallway distorted and elongated making it impossible for Tim to reach his goal, to reach Bruce.  
“Who are you?” The ghostly image of Bruce asked. Tim kept running towards Bruce, confused by the question. “Who are you?” Bruce repeated.  
The hallway went on forever and the end of the hallway got darker and darker until he saw Bruce no more. The darkness crawled toward Tim; it enveloped him until it was all he saw, suffocating him. Confusion overtook him as he heard two voices. He couldn’t make out anything, his senses in overdrive, not allowing him to compute anything.

Back out in the room.  
“Come on, Tim, don’t do this! Tim!”   
Tim’s eyes slammed open and he took in a deep breath. Tim reached his arms out, reaching for something only he could see. Both Roy and Jason moved in front of Tim, keeping in his line of sight. Tim looked back and forth between Roy and Jason in confusion. Tim began to openly sob.  
Jason smoothed Tim’s hair back, looking at the boy. “Hey, hey ,hey, what’s wrong?” Jason asked.  
Tim’s response chilled Jason as the boy looked at his brother with great confusion and croaked out, “Who am I?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just so you know with the whole people turning to dust and blowing away I wrote this long before Avengers Infinity War and can prove it by the dates I posted this story in other fanfic communities. So no copyright infringement or stealing ideas or anything like that, lol.


End file.
